Desperate Housewives
Color And Light

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Color And Light

George leads a blindfolded Bree into an empty house. Nice hardwood floors! Also, nice preppy pearls with sage-green short-sleeved sweater combined with salmon-pink cable sweater tied casually around the shoulders! Bree: "Okay, I'm starting to get the feeling that we're not going to a yard sale." George: "That was just a clever ruse to get you into my car." (Clever ruses designed at luring women into places they don't want to go being George's major at college.) He removes the blindfold, and Bree is understandably confused to find herself in the middle of an empty house, until George confesses with much self-glee that this is the house that he just now bought! Bree, being the nice lady that she is, is thrilled for George. Until! Out of nowhere pops George's mom, along with her friend (who is also George's real estate agent). George introduces a somewhat thrown Bree to his mom, who gushes, "George never introduces me to anyone, so I knew you were special!" They all smile at each other for a weird second, and then George's mom tells them that she and her friend are going to retreat to the back of the house so that George can "well...you know."

As soon as the two giggling ladies clear the room, George sighs and asks Bree if she really does like the house, seeing as he was hoping she would live there with him. Bree looks very surprised by this new development, but that isn't even the half of it, because next George pulls out a ring and asks, "Will you marry me?" Bree: "Huh?" George: "I love you, and I think I know how you feel about me. So why wait?" Bree: "George, Rex hasn't even been dead two months!" Wow, George is shaping up to be truly sociopathic, unable to adhere even to the most basic societal norms. George tries to win Bree over with some platitudes about how, if Rex's untimely death taught them anything, it's that they've got to seize the bull by the horns: "If we see a chance for happiness, we should grab it and hold on tight." Bree: "You see, I thought we were going to a yard sale." George: "Please, just say the word and make me the happiest guy on earth." Bree is standing there, trying to catch her breath, when George's mom and her friend race back in, carrying a tray with pre-poured champagne, all, "Congratulations, you two!" and "Mazel tov!" George: "Guys, wait. She hasn't said yes yet." The women apologize, and then retreat maybe two feet and then not so surreptitiously watch on as George re-pops the question. Bree starts in with what appears to be the preamble to a "no," but then she sees George's mother's chin start to tremble. And then Bree, with very weird abruptness, says, "Okay!" George, incredulous: "You will? You'll marry me?" Bree, in the same cheerful-robot voice, repeats her "Okay!" George hugs Bree, who looks pretty much like she's going to barf, and then Mom and Friend rush in and they hug and jump up and down with George, while Bree stands off on her own and chugs down an entire glass of champagne. And the "how stupid could Bree possibly be?" music swells!

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Desperate Housewives

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