Desperate Housewives

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LTG: B+ | Grade It Now!
Manners Are For Poor People. And Non-Felons.

Susan's doorbell rings. She opens the door to find Katherine standing there with some flowers. Katherine tells her that she's there under duress to apologize (at the watchful Mike's insistence), even though it is clear to Katherine that Susan should be apologizing for ruining the party. Katherine counts to three, decides that she's been there long enough to make Mike think she apologized, and walks away. But Susan calls her back, busting her for having lied about the painting (while also apologizing herself). Katherine thinks it's different, because it's so hard for Katherine to be constantly reminded about his relationship with Susan.

At Casa Hodge, they appear to be just about done with the main course. Bruce thanks her for the meal, and she tells him that she just wanted him to meet Tom. Bruce gives Tom an opening to talk about his career in the ad business, but Tom can't muster more than a half-hearted "I don't know." Lynette talks him up, but he just sits there like a big pile of crap. Bree and Orson leave them to talk in private while they fetch dessert. After more of Tom's indifference and Bruce's pitch, Lynette realizes that she wants the job, and mentions that she also has advertising experience. Tom stands up and asks to speak to her in the kitchen. Once there, he busts her for trying to steal his job. She points out that he didn't exactly seem eager to call dibs on it. (All of this takes place in front of Orson and Bree, by the way.) Tom says that she has messed with a bull and will get the horns, or some such bluster, and they stomp back to the dining room. Bree tells Orson, "Maybe we should slice the tarte in here. I don't want to bring a large knife into this." Oh, Bree, you and your prophetic powers. Commercials.

Back at the dinner party of the damned. Tom and Lynette have returned to the table. Tom claims to have been acting disinterested in order to gauge exactly how interested Bruce really was. He's passed the test, so Tom is interested in the job. He and Lynette start competing for the position. At first, they're each just talking themselves up, but it's not long before they start tearing each other down. It starts with Lynette pointing out that she used to be Tom's boss, and ends with Tom expressing a fond hope that Lynette's cancer not return and interrupt any work she might be doing for Bruce. This is where Lynette should have claimed that Tom cries during sex. It's probably not true, but it wouldn't be the first time those words have been uttered at this table. And when you're trying to emasculate and destroy your husband, you might as well steal from the best. (While all of this is going on, Orson and Bree are in the kitchen, where Orson is complaining about how Bruce is a total jerk.) Partway through the worst job interview ever, Bree and Orson re-enter the room and put slices of tarte down in front of everyone. After seeing just how crazy Tom and Lynette can be, Bruce makes an excuse to go home. He makes it clear that there's no way in hell either of them will be working for him. Orson tries to tempt him to stay by noting that the dessert is a tarte tatin. Bruce, into his recorder: "Idea for novel -- woman who's married to a gay man and doesn't know it." He puts down the recorder to put on his jacket, and Bree sees Orson palm it. She offers to wrap up a piece of the tarte to go, and follows Orson into the kitchen.

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Desperate Housewives




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