Desperate Housewives

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now!
Grace Is Gone & The Bears Are Coming

And then on the other side you've got Lynette's lynch mob, plus the leather-wearing Hydrangea Weathermen and ten other violent HOAs carrying identical murdered-out baseball bats and various bombs and rocket launchers and what have you. They don't really care about Paul either, but represent the isolationist forces within us all that have no choice but to choose our own kind over the Wrong Kind. I'll let Lynette explain:

"So if this protest works, and the place doesn't open, what happens to all those ex-cons? What happens to them? I mean, if they don't get to stay here, where will they go?" They'll just go back to where they came from, or some house in another neighborhood. "But what if that neighborhood doesn't want them either? I mean, if they've done their time, and they need a second chance, wouldn't it be better for them to be in a nice neighborhood?" In theory, yes, but that's not the way the world works. We have to think about our neighborhood, our children. "Ourselves?" Don't be cute. Some of these men may have good intentions, but some of them could still be really bad guys. "But if we don't even try to help them, are we so sure we're the good guys?"

Interesting question, Ginger Spice. Instead of answering it, or giving any of this another thought, Lynette runs off to make sure everybody's got their assigned gay Pinkerton backup from the Hydrangea Liberation Front and make sure all the white people have guns. "Remember to hate everybody unlike yourself, son!" she yells back over her shoulder, painting quarterback lines on her face, chugging Red Bulls, changing into camo, handing out photos of the ones we hate the most.

Richard heads on into Bree's house to finish up whatever Keith was going to do to her backyard or something, he manages to keep his shirt on during this conversation and no matter how many times Bree politely asks him to leave, he does not. Instead of doing as she asks, he assures her that he will not be leaving, and could she get him a cold drink? Instead of shooting him in the abdomen, Bree runs off to get him a drink and make him a sandwich. But since he didn't ask for the sandwich, probably he will punch her in a second. And she will love it.

Beth google-eyes Mayor Franklin about how he's a celebrity, and it's awesome. I wish she and Carlos were actually on this show, instead of just kind of. Paul says more menacing things about how he's doing all of this to show what he really thinks of Wisteria, and as usual it falls flat because A) The Mayor has no idea what you're talking about and B) You have now made that joke thirteen times.

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Desperate Housewives




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