Desperate Housewives

Episode Report Card
DeAnn Welker: A- | 1 USERS: A+
What Mystery?

Lynette's on her laptop when Tom comes in. She asks how the test went, and he says it's as though he "dug down deep and I found a new level of suck" that he didn't know existed. She says she's sure it wasn't that bad, but he says he puked tequila in the parking lot, passed out twice in the essay section, and giggled when he read the word "Uranus." So, basically like any other college freshman. Oh, and he also is pretty sure he spelled "Scavo" wrong (they won't mark him down for that). She says it's okay; they'll get a book for him to learn Chinese. He says you can't learn Chinese well enough to work in the international market from a book. She's all, "International market?" He says he wanted to totally reinvent himself, since someone who could speak Chinese with his marketing skills would be valuable. She says that's a brilliant plan and wonders why he didn't tell her. He says it doesn't matter now, and he's sorry he let her down. Someone is feeling a little guilty. [And stupid. How can she not know that China is a goddamn emerging marketplace? - Z]

Susan can't believe Mike and Katherine are getting married this weekend, but Mike says that's what's great about Vegas: No waiting. Katherine asks Susan if she wants to come and be the maid of honor, but Susan says no thanks. That's sweet, but totally ridiculous (although something I would sort of expect Susan to say yes to). She pretends she and MJ have big plans this weekend. Speaking of, Creepy Dave is putting ammo in his gun, tucking it in his pants, and walking toward MJ. He reaches behind him to pull it out when Susan runs out and greets him. She asks if the boat's still available this weekend, because she thinks he was right: They should get out of here for a few days. He agrees, saying it would do them all some good. And he laughs his crazy, creepy laugh. How on Earth do none of these idiots see how insane this man is?!

Aunt Connie is on the phone, thanking Carlos and Gaby for taking in Ana. She says she can finally be at peace, and tells him she loves him. She thanks Gaby, and gets off the phone. Another relative comes in and hands her a beer, asking if she's going to tell them the truth about Ana. Connie says they'll find out soon enough, and they toast their beer cans.

Lily Tomlin gets a phone call from Dr. Heller's receptionist. She asks if Roberta remembers her. She tells her the police stopped by and told her Dr. Heller's dead. Then Roberta's in her leather hat at Mrs. McCluskey's, filling her in that he died in the fire, except that the lack of smoke in his lungs means he was dead before the fire. Roberta's guess is that the person he was coming to see is the person who killed him, and they both obviously agree that's Creepy Dave. Roberta wants to go to the police, but Mrs. McCluskey thinks they need more proof first. So they decide to break into Creepy Dave's to find proof and to get him back for breaking into Mrs. McCluskey's.

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Desperate Housewives




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