Next week: Presumably Beth murders herself in an elaborate and public fashion, Felicia comes rocketing out of prison looking for triple-vengeance, Susan accidentally eats both of Beth's kidneys instead of getting them donated into her abdomen, or fashions them into a hat, or sells them for some magic beans on the magic black market. Gabrielle discovers what acting like a normal person feels like, but since by now Juanita's probably got a job as a paralegal somewhere and doesn't really need the stress, only Celia will "benefit." Zach will get cleaned up and go back to looking like a little kid and not the bad-ass hottie he's been looking like lately, which will make certain of us, not naming names, feel retroactively super-creepy. And Paul, if this is possible, Paul will get even more deranged, and blame somebody even more ridiculous for all his horrible travails. Somehow, Lynette will make all of these things worse.
Should this be the last season of Desperate Housewives? Find out.
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