And if you think about how they've set this up, it's actually very clever. All we know about Beth is that she was like this Rapunzel that Felicia kept trapped in the house and pimped out to her vendetta victims. She's only ever lived with her mom, and then Paul. And while I have no problem understanding why you would fall in love with Paul, the idea that he's literally the only other human being she's, like, met in her life grants this storyline a hell of a lot more weight than it otherwise should have. It wasn't like she made the choice to be a double agent, or any choices at any time: She did what her mom said, finally figured out her mom was fucking loony tunes, and then realized she'd lucked out by marrying a guy she could actually love. From a nightmare to a turnkey life as a not-so-desperate housewife: Boom, done. Happy ending. And now the shit hits the fan? Isn't that just so sad?

Keith would like to move to Florida so they can be closer to Charlie. As if to illustrate the fact that he is a lost child of a man-boy, these are his reasons, like his list of Pro reasons that Bree would be down for this: "We'll pick oranges, and swim with dolphins! And do all the other stuff you do in Florida!" Um, meth? And anyway, Bree's quite happy where she is, dumbass, and he already knew that, so then he passive-aggressives her all, "Unless... Oh, never mind. Well... No, I can't say it..." Which gets you a punch in the nose from me so don't ever do it, but Bree's just like, "Fuckin' what." The what is, what if he dumped Bree and moved to Florida because their relationship is ridiculous, but he would never say that, so goodnight. Shut up, Keith. Shut up, both of you.

Gabi's doing interview after interview on the hotel phone, and Carlos is like, "Remember the grave and the whole thing? You were going to let a red balloon into the air to symbolize our miscarriage or whatever?" Gabi says that being adored by everybody in a town that once made her feel like lowly, loathesome trash is the best kind of therapy. I don't know for sure, but that does sound pretty good. Still up in the air, as far as whether or not she's actually doing the letter thing, but the outlook is not good, and Carlos has to make that one face he makes, really hard, until she stops looking at him.