At Carlos's Prison Kick-off BBQ, music is playing, summer skirts are swishing, balloons are ballooning, and raw meat is smoking away on the grill. Carlos hands over the spatula to Gabby so that he can make his speech to the crowd, and almost immediately, Gabby starts looking a little Gaggy -- though she is looking lovely overall in a strapless coral pink top with a purple sash waistband and a ruffled little turquoise and purple flippy skirt. Meanwhile, Bree is wearing an amazing acid green sheath with retro mini-bow accents, while, uh oh, Edie is wearing plastic-surgery-huge sunglasses, a matronly pink suit with ruffle trim and, I think, nothing but an underwire bra? She looks absolutely hung-over. "I just wanted to say that it really means a lot to me that all of you came," Carlos announces. "And as you know, in a few days I will be taking a government-sponsored vacation. Lucky for me, breakfast is included." As everyone laughs over that little bon mot, Julie whispers an "oh god" to Susan. Zana, the impetus for Julie's "oh god," is wearing a light suit, an olive green shirt, and a lighter green tie. He is, I believe, the only person there in a suit. The look on his face is sour in the extreme, the perfect match to the one worn by his father. "The bottom line," Carlos continues with his toast, "is I'm going away to jail, and when a man goes away to jail -- which I hope none of you here have to do -- you see who your friends are. So thanks." Hear, hear! And with that, Gaggy races off to the bathroom to vomit, snatching on the way a glass and a full bottle of champagne from Susan's mom, who gives a snooty little "Excuse YOU." Nice pale yellow sweater set, Sophie!
"Stay put till I need you," George orders Ginger, "Don't talk to anybody, and for god's sake, don't get drunk." "You know," she says, "I was supposed to go to my cousin's wedding today." George: "It's not a wedding, it's a commitment ceremony." Ha!
Gabby is camping out in her bathroom, doing some deep breathing.
Meanwhile, Zana has brought Julie two hot dogs with all the fixings, which she rejects, as she does to his offer to go play some croquet. That's fine, he says -- they can just sit there. Julie snaps. "Zach! I don't want to be your girlfriend, I don't want to hang out with you, I just want you to leave me alone, okay?" "Kay..." he says with much sadness. As he walks away, Julie looks like she feels semi-bad, but also relieved to be finally shod of him.
Gabby pops the champagne and pours herself a glass. She stares at it for a second, sighs, and then pours it out into the sink. Oh my god, is she keeping her baby? Papa don't preach! Sulkily, she pulls a packet of birth-control pills out of a lacquered chest. (Huh, I thought she kept her pills in a weird briefcase thing.) She flips open the case and stares broodingly at the pills of betrayal. It looks as though she's about a week into this cycle, which means she should have just finished with her period. But, unless she's been pregnant for just a few days -- and really, I don't think she'd be all boob-tender and hurling that soon? -- I'm guessing she skipped her period altogether. Regarding the baby growing inside her womb? In which case, why would she be so surprised by the pregnancy? From what I know about the pill, you can pretty much set your watch by your period. Maybe she's one of the rare cases who gets her period even when she's pregnant? Or maybe she was so busy shopping for a shiny new MASERATI SPYDER to decorate he front driveway with that she missed her missed period? In any case! Gabby is mad. She asked Father Disappointed whom she should be mad at, and now she knows. She is mad at her birth-control pills! She slaps them. Then she beats them with her fist. Mad, mad, mad! After all this violence, the pills spring free from their plastic shell, and Gabby peers at them suspiciously. What have we here? MAVO: "In that moment, while looking at the pills that had been so obviously tampered with, Gabrielle's nausea was suddenly replaced by an even stronger sensation." Rage!