Desperate Housewives

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DeAnn Welker: A+ | 1 USERS: A+
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The End is Just the Beginning

Bree signs her business over to Sam, who says his lawyer will have to approve this. She tells him there's a codicil that he can't breathe a word about what he knows or he owes her a lot of money. He says that shouldn't be a problem; he's much better at keeping secrets than her daughter. Bree: "One can only hope." She tells him she doesn't hate him, but feels sorry for him since he wanted family, and ended up with just the business. She says that he doesn't care about anyone and doubts anyone will ever care about him. He looks sad, and she politely asks him to "Please be a dear, and close the door on your way out of my life." That is very much Bree's psychotic version of "Don't let the door hit you on the ass."

At the Bolens', Patrick lets Angie go in and say goodbye to Danny while he supposedly will put the bomb in the car. But that's not where he puts it; he leaves it in the closet right outside of Danny's bedroom, as Angie tells Danny to please understand that however this plays out, she had no choice. Aww. Knowing now what I didn't know the first time I saw this makes this a very sweet scene, because of the self-sacrifice she was willing to make for Danny. Patrick comes back in an tells her it's time to go.

Lynette's coaching Eddie through delivering her baby. He's off to one side, not looking, and she says he's going to have to look. Eddie's like, "I can't. It's so gross." But Lynette doesn't care, because he's going to have to "catch her." What a weird way to say that. So he agrees and looks. When he sees the head, he says there's something around her neck; he thinks it's the umbilical cord. She's turning blue. Lynette's like, "No!" But then she tells Eddie he's going to have to hook the umbilical cord with his finger and pull it over her head. He says he really can't, but she pleads with him, and tells him he has the chance to save a life. So he reaches down and then tells her it's done. She pushes a bunch more and then he's holding a giant baby. Without cutting the umbilical cord or anything (though, to the show's credit, they do make it seem like he at least cleaned her up first), he gives her to Lynette, who loves her baby, even with the gross chunks of something hanging all over her face. I'm thinking they probably clean them better than that in the hospital, but I don't have kids. [They polish them up real good first. - Zach]

Susan and Mike return home to their brat, who's all, "Where is he?! That's not fair!" Susan tells him how unfair life is, how sometimes even if you're a good person and do the right thing, life still won't give you back your dinosaur. Mike looks at her, exasperated as anyone who had to deal with Susan might be, and jumps in to tell MJ they'll take him to the pizza arcade. He thanks him and glares at his mom this time. MJ happily runs off, and Mike tells Susan that life didn't take her dinosaur; he did, so please let him have it. She tells him she loves him and respects him, but resents him for making her leave the home where she raised her children. She shows him the marks of her children's heights on a piece of door trim, and then she starts sobbing. He hugs her and says they're going to get it back, but in the meantime he removes the piece of door trim. Susan laughs and cries and looks like an overly plasticized frog.

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Desperate Housewives

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