Desperate Housewives

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M. Giant: B- | Grade It Now!
The Evil Leading the Blind

In the bathroom, Katherine vomits extravagantly, but refuses to accept Bree's advice to go home -- despite the fact that she's pale and de-coiffed and looking like, in Bree's words, "she should be in line at the needle exchange." Katherine is dead set on presenting that award. Bree wishes Katherine were simply dead.

Later, as a still-visibly-fucked-up Katherine takes the podium to present the award, Bree sits at the table with her friends and complains bitterly about Katherine's always stealing the spotlight. Right on cue, Katherine announces Bree's name, causing the literal spotlight to fall on Bree. Okay, not literally literally, but you know what I mean. Not that Bree couldn't use a Fresnel upside the head now and again. Lynette has to remind a shocked Bree to walk to the stage as Katherine concludes a glowing speech over thunderous applause. But as Katherine yields the podium, she pleasantly says in Bree's ear, "I know you tried to poison me." So, have a good speech, Bree!

We don't get to hear Bree's speech, though, because Lynette gets a call from Andrew and we have to listen to that instead: it seems that Rick's place is, as they speak, burning to the ground. Lynette turns and looks at Tom's empty chair. But then Tom arrives and takes his seat. Oh, good, mystery solved. That's a relief. I'd hate to think he did anything else stupid.

As the party breaks up, Katherine confronts Bree about what happened. "Was there a straw that broke the camel's back, or were you planning on killing me all along?" Bree comes clean: she's got her niche around here, and she doesn't know how to be friends with Katherine, who also fits into the same niche. Katherine says that it's a shame, because they could be best friends. Tough, steely Katherine has yet another almost-crying moment (I think this makes twelve episodes in a row, by my rough count), but manages to keep the tears from falling as she says that she understands Bree better than anyone. "Who knew you were so insightful?" Bree manages. Katherine just takes Bree's hand, pulls her close, and says, "Isn't learning fun?" Okay, where's that spinach dip?

Meanwhile, Julie and Dylan are both glad that Dylan had fun, and is starting to lighten up. "Thank you, Julie," Julie makes Dylan say, not once but twice. In fact, Dylan has lightened up so much that when Katherine and Bree show up to take pictures with them, Dylan takes her mom's arm.

Julie comes in late, to find Orson sitting at the foot of the steps, mercifully in pajamas. Julie realizes that Orson is sleepwalking, and is about to help him to bed when Orson says, "I'm sorry I ran you over, Mike." Julie swallows hard, and appears to decide that Orson can get his own ass to bed after that.

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Desperate Housewives




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