Desperate Housewives
It Takes Two

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It Takes Two

Later, in the waiting room, Gabby yells and yells at the doctor (and the doctor's attorney) from the fertility clinic, who desperately explains that the Solises' "embryo was accidentally switched with another client's." And it isn't just a matter of switching the babies with the also-sure-to-be-puzzled black couple, because Carlos and Gabby's embryo didn't "take." Which is kind of sad, especially since the baby might have been just the spackle Carlos and Gabby needed to stay together, and yet the baby is probably better off, right? Considering that, just tonight, Gabby and Carlos were bickering and trying to make each other jealous like two fourteen-year-olds? Oh, and I guess that's the last of Xiao Mei? Happy trails, Xiao Mei.

Down at the morgue, Bree and Orson -- still in their wedding finery (ew!) -- come in, and the doctor removes the sheet, and Orson shakes his head: "That's not Alma." Bree and Orson turn to leave, but then in strolls Jackie from Roseanne. Orson starts to put up a fuss. Jackie, icily: "You didn't honestly think they'd take your word for it, did you?" And yet, she looks down at the body -- and I could have sworn Orson looked as though he was steeling himself for something -- but Jackie confirms that: it isn't Alma. Everyone turns to file out, but Jackie starts screaming that Orson is still guilty. Bree: "We know what you think. Now would you please leave us alone?" Jackie, shocked: "He's a cold-blooded killer!" Bree, vehemently: "He's kind and decent, and nothing you can say will ever make me doubt him again. Now please go." Jackie marches out the door, but then she stops and turns and tells Bree that she "deserve[s] him." Bree, smugly: "I hope to." So they all leave, but Orson lingers behind and whispers, "Tu me manques, Monique." There's been much speculation on the boards as to what, exactly, that means, but my French-understanding friend, Jill, assures me it means, "I miss you, Monique," or literally, "You lack me," which is how someone says "I miss you" when in France. Or, it seems, when in a morgue with a toothless female body. But regardless of the translation, we all know what it really means: Bree's gone and hitched herself to some bad, bad news. Rinse and spit, Bree! Rinse and spit.

Carlos drives Gabby home. Gabby unbuckles her seatbelt, but stays in the car. Carlos sadly, wryly points out the "good news": "Now that there's no baby, it'll make the divorce a lot simpler." Gabby, exhausted: "Yeah, that's something." Carlos: "So, see you at the mediator's." Gabby gets out of the car and walks up to the house. The "Sad" music plays in a clear attempt to give this scene the feeling of "this is IT," but I'd be willing to bet that all this "divorce" talk is still just bluff.

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Desperate Housewives




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