Commercials: Kermit the Frog is at a fork in a yellow brick road, confronted with a sign pointing one way to Oz and a sign pointing the other way to Wisteria Lane. After a moment's pause, he turns to go down the road to the Desperate Housewives, and from off-screen comes the voice of Miss Piggy: "Don't even think about it, Frog." Kermit gulps and turns his beat right around. This May, hit the bricks with the Muppets' Wizard of Oz!
John the Gardner is Pepe LePeuing up Gabby's arm. Gabby looks bored and distracted. "I feel trapped," she says. "You want me to open a window?" he asks. Ha, such an awesomely literal 18-year-old's answer. "No I'm talking about my life." "Oh are we done making out?" Ha! "No no, keep going." As he kisses her neck and neck adjacent, Gabby keeps talking about how she's stuck in her marriage, how she doesn't have options, how she used to always have a Plan B. John stops with the kissing to ask, what about him, can't he be a Plan B? "Damn it, John," Gabby scolds, "what is our new rule?" "Stop pretending we have a future," he sing-songs. Whee! John wants to know why she can't just walk out on Carlos. Because then she'd be broke. But if she stays, Carlos is in control and that's horrible, too. Plus he cut up her credit cards, which means she's married to him AND unable to shop, the worst of all possible worlds. Poor Gabby, nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. Gabby tells John she's not feeling very fun today (where fun = sex-ish) and gets up to leave. Gardener John hops to his feet and whips out from his back pocket what is that, his health insurance card? Oh, okay, I guess it's his credit card, and he wants Gabby to take it so she can stop feeling trapped or whatever. Gabby makes a few weak attempts at saying no, but John insists that his mowing business is doing great, and with that she gives in, letting him know in her very softest voice that she'll pay him back. John says she can if she wants (sure, sure), but she doesn't have to. "Mrs. Solis, to take care of you, is my dream." He still calls her Mrs. Solis! "Well, far be it for me to stand in the way of a young man's dream," Gabby says, and pushes him back onto the couch. Looks like Gabby's feeling "fun" after all, and all it took was a lawn mower's credit card. Priceless!