Desperate Housewives

Episode Report Card
DeAnn Welker: C | 1123 USERS: B-
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Ashes Make the Heart Grow Fonder

Now we get a Susan voiceover, as she tells us that when she first met Edie, it seemed like they'd be best friends. Susan, in an ugly robe, is taking out her garbage with a donut in her hand (who does that?!), when she drops it into the can. Edie comes up right as Susan fishes it out and starts eating it. Edie thinks that's disgusting, but Susan says it landed on a detergent box. Um, still disgusting. So Edie gives her money so she can buy a fresh donut, booze, crack, or "whatever eases the pain." Because she thinks Susan's homeless, see? I can totally see how they were practically best friends, can't you? Susan uses what's in the garbage bag to prove she lives in her house. They shake hands, and Edie says she just moved to the neighborhood. She says she'll tell Susan all about it over a margarita, but Susan invites her in for coffee instead. Edie wants all of the neighborhood gossip and would like to start with Bree, asking if she is a robot. (I'm sure that back in the car, Bree is loving this story about the "nice" Edie.) Susan is happy that Edie's funny and likes to gossip. She thinks they'll get along just fine.

Next, Susan and Edie are running together, and Susan needs to rest after four blocks. Susan admits she hates running, and Edie asks why she didn't say something sooner. Susan says she wants to be friends, but Edie likes running and she likes to sit. Just then, a couple walks by, and Susan says hi to "Helen" and "Ed." She tells Edie she would have introduced them except that Helen would never stop talking. Edie says that's what Ed told her. She's gotten to know him "quite well." Susan is too dense to get what Edie means, so Edie comes right out with, "We're kinda doing it." Susan: "Doing what?" Seriously. She asked that. In Susan's world, there are not women who sleep with married men. Susan tells Edie she's being immoral and committing adultery. Edie points out that Ed's committing adultery, but she's just having sex. Susan doesn't look convinced. Edie wants Susan to forget it, but Susan says she can't forget it since Helen is her "very good friend." Edie's all, "I thought you just said..." Susan says, "She is annoying and I hide when she knocks on my door, but she does not deserve for you to be wrecking her marriage." Susan leaves Edie standing on the street, and tells her she doesn't think she'll be her friend anymore.

Desperate Housewives

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