Desperate Housewives

Episode Report Card
DeAnn Welker: C | Grade It Now!
Ashes Make the Heart Grow Fonder
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

No previouslies, despite this show having been on hiatus forever. Instead, we start off with the zooming car Edie was driving at the end of the last episode, as Edie fills in for Mary Alice (let's hope just for this week, though). She explains that she was driving, and crashed into a utility pole. [No mention of Black-Ops Orson running into the road? - Zach] Then, to add insult to injury, she was electrocuted. Edie (who is seriously terrible at doing voiceovers; there is a reason a voice as smooth as Mary Alice's leads us into and out of each episode) says it was "one of those days." You know what she means, right? Those days when you die. She explains all of her friends heard it, and ran away from their microwave burritos (Susan), their expensive jars of night cream (Gaby), their racy pay-per-view movies (Tom, sans Lynette). They all hurried outside and saw Edie. No one moved or talked. They just stared, until Gaby said, "Oh my God," and, as Edie tells us, "All hell broke loose." [I think she's overstating it a bit. - Z] Edie tells us everyone's concern was touching but pointless. Edie hears Susan whisper that she's going to get through this. Edie's voiceover tells her she's wrong again. And then Edie dies, smiling. She tells us she died just like she lived: as the complete and utter center of attention. Oh, she so wishes. Credits. Where, you know, Edie has never been present holding an apple. So ... hardly the center of attention.

Edie continues to voiceover, explaining that "her husband" (is this dead Edie not supposed to know about Creepy Dave being... well, Creepy?) asked her neighbors to do her a favor after she died. [Yeah, why are they glossing over the Orson and Dave dramas? Is it to not let anything take away from Nicolette's special day? - Z] We get a shot of Gaby, Mrs. McCluskey, Lynette, Susan and Bree on a couch, looking like they don't like whatever they've just been asked to do. But they do it anyway. The next day, they pile into a car with two Thermoses filled with a coffee, a basket of baked goods, and an urn filled with Edie. In the car, Gaby says she hates that they have to do this, and that it's the kind of thing a relative should do. Lynette says that might be true, but they're in the car, so could she stop bitching. Gaby asks for music, so she can sing instead of bitch, but Mrs. McCluskey says if Gaby sings, she'll be the one doing the bitching. Apparently, it's a four-hour drive, which is why Gaby's so miserable. Susan suggests that they all share their stories about Edie, since she's the reason for this trip. Lynette says Susan should start with the time Edie tried to steal her comatose boyfriend. Susan prefers stories that put Edie in a positive light. Gaby asks what they'll do after those five minutes are up. Bree says she's all for saying nice things, but points out that Susan and Edie clashed right from the start. Susan says "That's what everybody thinks," and we flash back into her memories.

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Desperate Housewives




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