Desperate Housewives
Love Is In The Air

Episode Report Card
Jessica: C+ | Grade It Now!
Love Is In The Air

Lined up on her sofa, the boys all look at Mrs. Landingham. She gives them each some peanut brittle, and takes a seat: "Go ahead, make with the apology." "We're sorry," they sing in unison. "That's it, huh? Didn't you know that stealing is wrong? How old are you anyway?" she asks. The twins chirp that they're six, and Pasternak is five. "Well, your mother just pops them out, doesn't she?" Mrs. Landingham says, mostly to herself. Pastrami asks her how old she is. "How old do you think I am?" she asks. "A hundred and fifty?" he offers. She tells them to just hurry it up and eat their brittle. They all shovel it in. "Who's that?" Protozoan asks, pointing to a photograph of a kid on the mantle. Mrs. Landingham explains that he's her little boy. "Where does he live?" Pretzel asks. "He died when he was twelve," Mrs. Landingham tells them. He got sick, she tells them vaguely: "He was a little terror like you three. You would have liked him. Now, are you done with the peanut brittle? Let's go."

Pagoda, Palindrome, and Portcullis get up to follow her out, but she stops and turns to tell them something. "What you did was wrong, but it's nice that you wanted to get a present for your mom for Valentine's Day. Nobody's ever gonna love you like your mother," she says, before ushering them out. If Lynette knew about this, she should swallow her pride and hire Mrs. Landingham to baby-sit. MAVO explains that Lynette would never grow to love her neighbor, "never realizing that love...was the one thing...she and her neighbor HAD IN COMMON." I am so tired of Brenda Strong's sing-songy line readings.

Later, Susan sits in her yard, looking at the Valentine Mike gave her. Lynette comes over and takes a seat. "My kids have been on kind of a thieving jag," she explains, unwrapping a handkerchief to reveal some jewelry. "They said they stole it from Mike's garage. From inside his work bench. Your Mike." Susan takes the bracelet and turns it around to see the engraving: Martha [Kravitz]. Because everyone gets their jewelry engraved with their full name. Most of mine has my Social Security number on it, too. "Is that blood?" Susan asks, looking at some schmutz on the jewelry. "I don't know," Lynette tells her quietly. "What does this mean?" Susan asks. "I don't know," Lynette repeats. They both look stricken.

Time for the Episode-Ending Montage, the crutch of writers everywhere who can't figure out how to write a proper ending. Gabrielle comes home, looking tired. Carlos sweeps her up in his arms and hugs and kisses her. She looks happy. KimberBree takes Rex's handcuffs out of the dishwasher and shakes her head ruefully. As MAVO yaps about decent men turning to desperate measures, Paul waves at Felicia, who eyeballs him right back. "Long after we're gone, love remains," MAVO says, as Mrs. Landingham looks at her child's picture. "Burned into our memories." Susan looks across the street sadly. "We all search for love. But some of us...after we found it...WISH WE HADN'T." Okay, okay, all right all ready. I hear you. Pipe down.

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Desperate Housewives




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