Desperate Housewives
Move On

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Move On

The next morning, Claire comes downstairs to Lynette, and gets herself a cup of the Coffee of Nudity. She sheepishly admits that she didn't want to come down until Gay Matt left for work, because she's still a little embarrassed. But I thought Lynette and Gay Matt were going to the mall to get the water heater! Who gets a water heater on a weekday? I am so confused. And so is Lynette, about the possible reasons that Claire could possibly be embarrassed around Gay Matt. Claire blushes and recounts the entire sordid story. Lynette looks displeased, and also wrinkled.

Gabrielle has taken her absurdly short model self to the town's local modeling agency. The agent looks through her book and tells her that he can get her work, but cautions that it'll be different from the work she did as The World's Shortest Supermodel. "Of course," Gabrielle sniffs. "I made $10,000 a day." Because Gabrielle was apparently Linda Evangelista in a former life. Gabrielle assures him that she knows this is...lower-rent work. The agent nods, and tells her that he's got a great gig at the mall! Just her and a car and a revolving platform! Gabrielle is not particularly thrilled with this, but the agent reminds her that he's the only modeling agent for 100 miles -- it's his way or the highway. Hmmm. How is this possible? How far out in the sticks are they? 100 miles is a long, long way. Where is Gay Matt, for example, commuting to? He's the President of Something For Some Big Company. Surely, they're not located in Nowheresville. And what about Carlos? Where the hell is he commuting to? This just doesn't make any sense. I swear, it's like every scene on this show takes place in an entirely different universe from any other scene. Anyway, Gabrielle sighs, and bites the bullet: "This Buick thing. Does it include lunch?"

Speaking of meals, KimberBree serves Rex his lunch on a platter as he recoups on the sofa. I long for her fancy apron. I clearly need one of those. Anyway, Rex is really grateful for what she's doing for him. Or at least he claims to be. KimberBree sniffs that she doesn't need his gratitude: "You're only here because your children are master extortionists." Rex is surprised that KimberBree didn't tell Andrew about.... "Your adultery?" KimberBree sings. "Nooo. I decided to keep that little gem all to myself." Rex wonders if she would feel better if he told her he was really, really, really sorry. KimberBree says that it would make her feel better...if she had any feelings for him anymore: "But, as it stands, the place you used to occupy in my heart is very much empty now." Rex finds this hard to believe, and points to his beautifully appointed lunch tray as proof. "The tray was prepared with tender loving care," he says, waving at the good china and carefully arranged bouquet. KimberBree smiles brightly: "Do me a favor, Rex. Please don't mistake my anal-retentiveness for actual affection." And with that, she sweeps out, taking the flowers with her. Bless her heart.

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Desperate Housewives

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