Desperate Housewives

Episode Report Card
DeAnn Welker: B | Grade It Now!
Guilty Until Proven Innocent

Previously: John told Gaby he was getting married. Bree's marriage fell apart, since Orson blackmailed her into staying married. So she started cheating with Karl. Lynette told Susan she's pregnant, but she hasn't told anyone else yet. Julie was attacked, and Danny was arrested. His mom told him to keep his mouth shut. Susan watched him be arrested, and looked sort of smug for someone who has a daughter in the hospital.

Mary Alice's voiceover begins by talking about how there's a certain type of woman in the suburbs: a housewife. She doesn't bother trying to be beautiful, because it's a waste of time. As she finished that sentence, we see Gaby, who's hair's up in a messy bun (but not an intentionally messy bun; more like a messy clip-up, actually), get hit by some food that Juanita was aiming for Celia. She asks Ana for help, but Ana just increases her iPod volume. It's a tight ship Gaby and Carlos are running. As they're eating, it becomes clear they're at a restaurant, and a familiar voice says, "Gaby?" An older-looking, hotter-than-ever John walks up. He makes small talk and then tells them he owns the restaurant, and he's divorced. He can't believe they have kids. He pretends to see the family resemblance between Ana and Gaby, and then makes a snide comment at Carlos's expense when he finds out she's actually on Carlos's side of the family. Carlos says he'd like some bread, please, and John leaves. Gaby takes her hair down and makes herself look all pretty as Carlos watches, all, "What the hell, woman?!" Mary Alice finishes that this certain woman in the suburbs doesn't try to look beautiful unless she has someone to look beautiful for. And that "someone" is apparently not her husband. Opening titles.

Mary Alice continues that on Wisteria, every day begins with a cup of coffee (as opposed to... where, exactly?). Some need it to wake up (a very sleepy, mussed-looking Katherine). Some have it with their morning paper (Tom). Some drink it on their way to work (Carlos fills a thermos). Some just want something to hold in their hands while they gossip in the street. Lynette, Susan and Gaby gossip about Danny seeming so nice, other than the whole choking-Julie incident. Susan's just glad they caught the guy. Then Bob drives up with Danny and Angie. Susan crosses the street and asks Bob what the hell Danny's doing free. Bob says the police had no grounds to hold him, and then Susan asks if Bob's his lawyer. Bob says he loves Julie, but there's no proof Danny did it. She says what about the fact that he faked an alibi? Angie steps in and says he's a scared kid. Susan tells Bob she doesn't know how he sleeps at night and then, when Angie asks if they can talk about it, Susan yells to the whole street that Angie's son tried to kill her daughter, and as long as he's free, no one on the street is safe.

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Desperate Housewives




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