Billy Bob has talked Gabby into donating some of her old clothes to a homeless shelter. Oh man, could he be more wrong for her? He gushes about how much fun do-gooding is, but Gabby's not listening; she's too distracted watching Carlos jog by. BB and Gabby get into the car, and Gabby asks if they can stop at the florist's on the way down to the shelter: she needs to get her mother some birthday flowers. Since Gabby isn't really on flower-giving terms with her mother, this is clearly a ruse. Oh-ho, this is going to be rich.
Susan places a call to Ghostbuster Ridley. She wants to "drop a dime" on Orson. She actually says that. "Drop a dime." Ghostbuster greets this tired lingo with an exhausted, resigned sigh. That's exactly how Susan makes me feel! She tells him about how Orson was having an affair with Monique. In the middle of the call, her call waiting beeps. She clicks over and it's Bree, inviting her to a dinner party. Susan is pleasantly surprised by the olive branch, and (after clicking back and forth with Ridley a few times) she warmly accepts the invitation, saying how relieved she is to be putting their fight behind them, what a great friend Bree is, etc., etc. Then, before Bree even finishes her last sentence, Susan clicks back to Ridley again to add that Orson also spent time in an insane asylum. I'm impressed that the writers showed such restraint in this scene -- I was so sure that Susan was going to mix up her calls and ruin everything. Instead she just revealed herself to be kind of a bitch.
Gabby rolls into the florist and tries to sweet talk the woman -- sort of a matronly, mom kind of lady -- into letting her see the receipt for the anonymous bouquet of flowers. The woman sifts through a box of slips and finds the one in question, only there's a note on it: the buyer wants to remain anonymous. Gabby does some more of her patented smiling and wheedling, but the woman refuses to budge: "Do you know how many girls don't get flowers? I work in a flower shop, I've never gotten any freaking flowers! So stop your whining about who sent them and just be glad that they did." Bitter Flower Lady heads into the refrigerated walk-in, and the "Gabby's Going to do Something Idiotic" music twinkles. Gabby locks Bitter Flower Lady inside the walk-in with a broom handle and starts riffling through the box of receipts. Bitter Flower Lady, muffled: "I know where you live!" Gabby: "Oh yeah? Well stop by, we'll hot tub." (For some reason this throwaway line strikes me as very funny.) As you so know he would, Billy Bob strolls in and busts Gabby right in the middle of this slapstick tableau, with the caged woman and Gabby standing there with receipts clenched between her teeth. Gabby tries to explain that she was only trying to confirm that Carlos sent the flowers. Realizing that Gabby is perhaps obsessed with her ex-husband, Billy Bob breaks up with her. Gabby, looking sad but a little relieved, too, concedes that she probably isn't ready to date just yet. Bitter Horndog Flower Lady pipes up that she's MORE than ready to date. Billy Bob shoots her a trapped animal look.













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