Desperate Housewives
No Fits, No Fights, No Feuds

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Evany: B | 1 USERS: A+
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No Fits, No Fights, No Feuds

Tom tucks Kayla into bed. She's clutching what appears to be...yes, it is. It's a baby harp seal stuffie. Right, so in case you were looking for cues, that should set the tone. Tom explains that Mrs. McCluskey will be downstairs the whole night, and he and Lynette are going to be just across the street (over at Bree's dinner party). Kayla is very nice and sweet -- clearly her heinousness is only directed at Lynette. Tom gently asks her what the deal with her Ice Scream fit earlier today. Why is she so upset with Lynette? Kayla, blankly: "Because it's her fault my mommy died. Mom only went to that store because Lynette was trying to steal me." Ah, yeah. I can actually see Snora saying that to Kayla as she set off to go confront Lynette.

Tom explains that that isn't true, that the situation is "way more complicated than that." Which in fact isn't the most comforting, or even helpful, thing he could say here. He tells Kayla that Lynette loves her, and that Kayla has "got to give her a chance." Kayla agrees that she'll be good and Tom kisses her on the forehead. Aw. But then Demon-seed Kayla says: "But I'm never going to love her. And you can't make me." The camera pans up and we see Lynette peeking through the doorway, looking crushed. Oh whatever. If Lynette thought this was going to be a totally smooth transition, moving half-orphan Kayla into the house, she wasn't really thinking things through. And even a bitter girl who swears she won't ever love someone can change over time. Didn't Lynette see International Velvet? Also, Lynette: stop eavesdropping.

Gabby stops by Mike and Carlos's house on her way to Bree's dinner. She's wearing what appears to be a mink coat, which seems like overkill seeing as Carlos, who is sitting out on the front porch, is wearing nothing but jeans and a long-sleeved tee. Gabby drolly reports that Carlos has "won," as in the scheming she suspects him of has succeeded in breaking up her boring relationship with Billy Bob. But she wants Carlos to admit that he sent the flowers. Carlos: "Gabby, if was going to send you flowers, I wouldn't send pink roses. I'd send you white orchids because I know they're your favorite. And if I wanted to cheer you up: sunflowers. And for the flu, blue irises." Are you writing this down? Because you might want to remember all these tidbits for when the inevitable Desperate Housewives trivia game hits the shelves. Gabby sits down next to Carlos and says, "I hate that you know me so well." They share a nice little moment -- she complains about having to "eat pudding out of a cup" at her horrible picnic, he commiserates that he got "dragged to the ballet" by a date recently. Gabby: "So you are dating. That's why you've been lifting weights and jogging?" Carlos: "Well if you want to bag the big game," he lifts his arm and makes a muscle, "you got to work on the big guns." She laughs and then bittersweetly tells him that he's "going to be a tough act to follow." Carlos: "Back at you, babe." Kind of nice! And up swells the "Why Can't You Two Idiots Get It Together and Get Together?" violas, xylophone, and tuba.

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Desperate Housewives

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