Enter Bud Penrod (played by Hey! It's That Guy! Stephen Tobolowsky) of Town and Country Insurance, the "Can Do" people. He looks at Susan's demolished house and hilariously comments, "Well that's no fun at all, is it?" Susan ruefully agrees, and then asks how long she'll have to wait for her check. According to Bud, the fire department has ruled the incident as arson, so her claim is going to be held up until the police figure out who's responsible. And really, do you blame Susan's insurance people for being a little cagey? After all, her house has been deliberately licked with flames (at least) once before. Bud and Susan go back and forth about who might hate Susan enough to do such a thing. Susan draws a complete blank, insisting that she's universally loved in Fairview. Why, the entire neighborhood is there trying to help Susan put the cinders of her slashed and burned life back together again! And yet...what about the spurned little doctor Ron? Or Susan's bio-father's wife, the one who spray-painted Susan's garage with foot-high letters that spelled out "WHORE"? Or Susan's ex-agent, whom she rejected and deserted when he was at his very lowest? Or hey, what about the paperboy, who probably still hasn't recovered after his heinous Susan-caused crash? Conveniently forgetting all these injured parties, Susan continues to insist that she's totally popular. But then she spies Edie, who's standing across the street in an outfit of head-to-toe pink with not a smudge of neighborly soot to be found. Not only is Edie not helping out Susan out, she's showily sucking on a phallic and also outfit-matching popsicle (one of those pink and yellow sherbet Missile pops) with suspiciously carefree glee. A look of grim understanding passes across Susan's face, and cue the abbreviated title sequence (sigh).

(And goodbye to Mr. Penrod! It's a lovely and all-too-brief visit from the Tobolowsky, but fear not, we'll be able to get our Tobolowsky fix soon enough in National Lampoon's Totally Baked: A Potumentary, due out later this year.)