Desperate Housewives
Remember

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Remember

Down at the nut farm. Bree is lost in memories of the Great Lawn Frog Caper, so when Kyle MacOrson taps her on the shoulder, she jumps in surprise. Bree is confused, as am I; what is Susan's movie savior doing in Bree's storyline? It turns out he has a "friend" (he gestures to a woman -- in her late thirties? Forties? -- slumped in a wheelchair in the corner, vacantly staring out a window), whom he visits "three or four times a week": "Small world, huh?" Bree: "Yes. Excruciatingly so." He commiserates with a laugh. Bree explains with a bright chirp that she just needed a "nice long rest"; then she lowers her voice and asks MacOrson to please not say anything to Susan, who thinks that Bree's at a "spa." He soothes that her "secret is safe," and Bree leans even closer to comment conspiratorially that she's not like "these other people." People like MacOrson's "friend," for instance? He lays on the eye contact and tells her that he "can tell," because "a real lady always stands out in a crowd." Blech. I'm detecting some real subterranean creep afoot here, but Bree is just gobbling it up. Private to Bree: Did you hear they took "gullible" out of the dictionary? You might also want to check to see if your copy has been abridged to leave out "psychotic," "evil," and "warped," because from past experience, I'd say you don't seem to understand any of those words.

MacOminous leaves to go sit with his "friend," and a random woman sitting across from Bree on the couch pipes up with a commiserable: "Boy, do I feel for you: trying to convince your friends that you're still normal when you're surrounded by a bunch of loons." Bree, gleeful (you mean I'm not alone in this hellhole?): "You TOO?!" The woman snarks that she also thinks their doctor is crazier than most of the patients. Bree asks if the woman knows anything about MacMenace's "friend," and Bree's new friend gossips that the woman hasn't spoken since she arrived. MacDoom's visits last for hours, and he talks and talks to her, but she doesn't seem to hear him. Bree sits there, looking sad and sympathetic, and then the scene ends. Huh? The way they set up this scene, I was so sure the gossipy, "everyone else is so crazy" woman was going to reveal herself as completely bananas: "And that's why," she would gleefully confess, "I wear tinfoil shoulder pads" or "I eat nothing but fingernail clippings." Yes, ending the scene like that would be predictable (as proven by my anticipation of it, QED), but without any kind of "payoff" like that, the scene seems pretty pointless and lackluster. So, what, we learned that MacMalefic talks to the silent woman but she doesn't respond, and that the head of the nuthatch is maybe not the greatest brain doctor, but did we need a whole separate scene to reveal these slender morsels? I guess two hours is quite a lot of time to fill.

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Desperate Housewives

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