Desperate Housewives

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Something's Coming

Sitting on hard chairs at the hospital, Susan notices Mike's jimmy-leg and asks if he's okay. He says he's just stressed about the wait, but before Susan can get an answer out of him as to whether that's all, he gets up and starts yelling at a doctor over how long they're waiting. And then he starts beating up the doctor. Well, at least they're in a hospital.

After the commercial, Mike is handcuffed to a chair while he waits for Susan to get finished with her exam. She comes out and sits next to him, saying she and the baby are fine. Mike apologizes, and Susan says she talked to the doctor about rehab for Mike. Mike vows to kick the habit himself, saying he's done it before, but Susan isn't so sure. "I think I've hit bottom here," he says, and promises to fix it. A nurse stops by with a box of NARCOTIC PAINKILLERS for PREGNANT SUSAN's mildly sprained ankle. Susan's in the middle of tucking them in her purse when she's amazed to see the pleading look on Mike's face. "Kinda had a rough day here," he begs. "I've just got to get through this." Remember when Bree said that addicts are masters of deception? Clearly Mike is not an addict. Susan, bless her, not only says no, but tells Mike it's either rehab or she's leaving. Mike gives in.

Edie's out in the wind in front of Gabby's house, figuring out how to mess with the luggage Gabby's got sitting on the porch, But then a much richer -- literally -- opportunity to fuck with her enemies presents itself in the form of Carlos's accountant, in a rush to drop off the papers so he can get home to his family. Mistaking Edie for Gabby, the accountant hands over the only copy of a folder relating to Carlos's offshore account and tells Edie not to lose it. Edie is only too happy to take it. The accountant says she's as pretty as Carlos says. "Oh, no, I'm prettier," Edie firmly corrects him.

Inside, a still-packing Gabby somehow hears the accountant drive away over the roar of the wind. Opening her French doors to the upstairs balcony, she looks outside to see Edie going down her walk, looking at a folder. She hollers down at Edie, who scampers away. "Oh, crap," Gabby says, not even bothering to close the doors as she gives chase.

The TV news is getting staticky in Mrs. McC's basement. She's busy with that, so she doesn't notice when Lynette leaves her apparently dying husband's side to steal the cat and bring it upstairs. I don't know how everyone else fails to notice it as well.

Gabby bangs on Edie's door. Riffling through the papers, Edie calls back, "I've called the police! They're on their way, and they are going to taser your ass!" Just like that, Gabby seems to give up. But she's only smashing in a window. "Oh good, you're home," she says as she and Edie square off.

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Desperate Housewives

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