Gaby produces a jug full of about two margaritas and offers them around, and they act like trash for awhile, and Hector tries to join in with some misogyny chuckles of his own, and then Carlos gets Gaby to admit she forgot to pick up the Thanksgiving pies. (Glad you asked: Cherry-Nopalitos which is cherry pie with cactuses in it, Pumpkin-Tripas which is pumpkin pie with brains in it, and Organ Meat Empanadas.) She tells him they're good having pudding and Halloween candy, and he threatens to hit her, so she says she's had a glass of wine, but he threatens to hit her again, and it's so uncomfortable that finally Hector threatens to take her to the pie store to get the goddamned pies. Everybody agrees that all women are unreasonable bitches and that marriage is akin to sitting on a knife, and they leave.
Susan screams Happy Thanksgiving! at Renee, all kinds of retardy for the party, and Renee's like, "You live in an apartment, take it down a notch." MJ says something truly rude and unlikely, so Renee does something even more cartoonish and points out the chalk line past which children are not allowed to proceed. The kids' table is in the driveway, although it was in the street before the cops made her move it. If the show would just commit to being this over the top all the time, it would be really good. But the smarmy need to manipulate emotions, and imply really mean things about women -- the two things that qualify it as "camp," which is why camp sucks -- throw off the whole mix.
Susan barely acknowledges Lynette and Tom, looking around immediately for Paige and hoping she can fuck up Lynette's parenting some more. Turns out she can. The twins are watching her and football at the same time, and have been authorized to pick her up if she cries for more than 20 minutes. Susan's laziness and selfishness cause her eyes to mist over as she stares down the street at the baby she just knows she could raise better than its own mother.
McCluskey and her random husband show up at Bree's, because apparently last year they ate at the "Pancake Castle" and that she thought this was so sad -- which it is, and pointlessly so -- that she invited them to her house this year. And promptly forgot, due to having her brains fucked out, ten minutes at a time, every few days, by a middle-aged housepainter. Roy doesn't care one way or the other, and assumed that she would forget, but you know that's not how McCluskey rolls. Just then, Keith and his messed-up parents arrive, and Roy goes, "Oh look, invited guests. We'll get out of the way." See Susan, there's a way to be cutely ungrateful: Just be a dotty old person with no accountability and you can say whatever you want. Richard and Mary, meanwhile, are also bickering horribly at each other.