Susan's car. Kendra is coming clean with the dirt: Mike wasn't a drug dealer, Deirdre was. Yes, Mike had been a heroin user, but he'd kicked the habit. Unfortunately, Deirdre never could give it up, and one day an undercover cop caught her using and forced her to sex him, again and again, as a thank-you for not sending her (back to) to jail. Mike found out about the arrangement, busted in on them, the cop pulled a gun, they both went over a balcony, and Mike was the only one who got up. As this story unfolds, Susan's face gets sadder and sadder. "I knew he was good," she cries, "I just knew it. Thank you!" Notice how Susan never asks Kendra what happened to her sister or anything. Just the (Susan-related) facts, please!

MAVO: "The vow is simple, really. Those who take it promise to stay together for better or for worse." Sophie gets her bigger, stronger, faster ring, "richer of for poorer," and Morty gets the whopping bill. "In sickness and in health," Rex gets examined at the doctor's office while a very sad Bree pats his arm. "To honor and to cherish," a very sexy, morning-after-haired Lynette kisses Tom as he leaves for work. "Forsaking all others," Gabby and Carlos embrace as Gardener John rides his mower in the background. "Until death do us part," CreePaul gazes at his wedding photo with MA and then puts it into his suitcase. "Yes, the vow is simple. Finding someone worthy of such a promise is the hard part." Susan races over to Mike's house and starts frenching him. "But if we can, that's when we begin to live happily...ever...after."

Next week: Susan's moving in with Mike, Gabby's leaving Carlos, Rex is having a heart attack, and Edie's bringing doughnuts!