Casa Endless Divorce. An envelope arrives for Carlos, and Gabby catches him guiltily locking it away in his desk. Gabby encourages Carlos to take a shower, citing his post-work-out sweat-hog-ness. And he does look extremely sweaty in this scene -- very sparkly. While he's in the shower, Gabby sneaks the key out of his shorts, opens his desk, and faxes her lawyer the contents of the envelope. She has a rough moment when Carlos gets out of the shower and puts on his shorts before she gets the chance to return the key, but she sidesteps it by demanding that he hand the shorts over to be washed. Carlos, disbelievingly: "You want to wash my shorts?" Gabby: "I don't want to, but if you wear them one more time, they're going to ask me themselves." He slips them off, hands them over, and just as she's almost free, he calls her back over and digs the key out of the pocket: it appears as though sly Gabby's managed to sleight-of-hand the key back into place just in time.
Outside, Gabby's on the phone with her lawyer, who explains that the contract is a $2 million job offer for Carlos. Plus stock options. But the thing is, Gabby doesn't see a penny of that money if the divorce goes through before Carlos signs the contract. Gabby: "That conniving, underhanded snake. Thank god I broke into his desk." Gabby's eyes light up with that special scheming shimmer, and she asks what would happen if the divorce were delayed somehow.
Oblivious Susan struts onto the coma ward carrying flowers and wearing a floating, multi-patterned Uli-style dress. She heads right on in to Mike's room and...there's Edie, stripped down to her bra and riding Mike like he's a prize-winning bronco, only he's not doing much bucking. He's actually just kind of lying there. Susan turns and runs up the hall, dropping flowers in her wake. Hey, I didn't know Edie was into necrophilia.
COMMERCIALS: Salma Hayek unleashes her hounds on Ugly Betty.