Desperate Housewives

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Good Stuff, Maynard

Gabby tries to explain to Ellie why she's having an affair with Roy, despite Carlos being the love of her life. "Sometimes you get bored, and a big, greasy, disgusting handyman really hits the spot," she flusters. Ellie doesn't seem convinced, but what's she going to say?

Katherine, coming home to find her front door ajar, reaches for the gun in her purse just as Adam pulls open the door from inside. He was lucky not to get some hollowpoints in a nice, tight grouping pattern through his shirt pocket. He's heard that Wayne is back, and is offering to help out by scaring Wayne away from Dylan. When Katherine tells him that won't work, Adam brings up the idea of a trip he promised Dylan, and suggests that maybe they won't come back.

Gabby, Lynette, and Bree are visiting Susan and Baby Maynard in the hospital, and they don't love the kid's name any more than Susan does. Upon hearing about Mike's grandfather, Lynette deadpans, "How did he die? Was he beaten to death because his name was Maynard?" They strongly advise Susan to lean on Mike to change the name. But why would Susan do that when she can hatch a harebrained scheme to get her way in a sneaky, yet ridiculously ill-advised manner?

When Lynette comes home, the CPS ladies are back, and this time they have a cop with them, since Kayla showed them her burn marks. Despite Tom rushing out to defend Lynette, she ends up cuffed and stuffed into the back of a squad car while her kids watch from the windows. From the upstairs window, Kayla's evil smirk is once again in evidence. I really hope this storyline has a satisfying conclusion, if only so we can see whether Kayla has another expression.

Bree's at a dinner with Reverend Green at Scavo's Pizzeria. Apparently they're discussing some kind of function that Bree wants the reverend to address, but it's really so we can learn that the reverend is now separated from his spouse as well. And then Orson shows up, so Bree asks the reverend to take her hand. Seeing this, Orson bails, and Bree is glad to see it worked. I don't get why Bree isn't alarmed to discover that she's apparently slipped into some kind of alternate Sweet Valley High universe, but there's a lot about Bree I don't get.

Tom visits Lynette in the pokey, promising he'll have her bailed out in a couple of hours. She insists that Tom fix this.

The reverend drops Bree off at her house, and of course he puts the moves on her. When she rejects him, he gets kind of upset and starts yelling at her in Korean. Did I not mention before that he was a missionary in Korea for several years? If not, please see above regarding my aforementioned shitfacedness.

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Desperate Housewives

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