Back on Wisteria Lane, Katherine is out walking when Mike comes back from a disastrous date. He says she was grilling him the whole time, and that he just wants someone he can get coffee with. It's too late for coffee, so Katherine invites him in for lemonade, holding up a lemon. Please tell me she just came back from the corner store, and wasn't taking the lemon for a walk. Mike accepts, because when Dana Delaney offers you lemonade, you say yes.
Tom and Porter walk towards the house and Tom reiterates to him the he doesn't think he's emotionally ready for sex. Porter says he heard him. Hey, where's Preston, anyway? Did he die? Did Porter kill him? Porter offers to put the car cover on the convertible, but once Tom is inside, he runs to Mrs. Schilling's car up the street and makes out with her. According to Mary Alice, she is a dangerous woman, blind to the consequences of her actions.
Also dangerous: wives enraged by betrayal, as illustrated by Lynette packing a suitcase in her bedroom. Also also dangerous: Mrs. H, who is a predator, deviously setting a trap. Also also also dangerous: the McCluskey sisters, who have Creepy Dave's phone records. Dave is apparently keeping a secret, and Mary Alice suggests he run for his life. Good advice, otherwise he'll end up pureeing all his food.
Next week: Susan and Jackson skip ahead to the good stuff, Orson has sex with Bree in the company kitchen, Mrs. H climbs into bed with Gaby and Carlos, and Lynette kicks some realtor ass.