Desperate Housewives

Episode Report Card
DeAnn Welker: B- | 1295 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Him? Hmm.

Previously: Gaby found out Lee and Bob want to adopt a baby. Mike was emasculated. Irina threatened Lynette and moved up the wedding. Girls were strangled. Orson and Andrew investigated Sam. And John Barrowman showed up to torment Wisteria Lane. Now: Mary Alice Voices Over that good neighbors help us with lots of stuff: car troubles, out of sugar, finding lost pets. [A turtle? How far did it get? - Zach] But they also show up and eavesdrop, as Gaby does outside Lee and Bob's window as they fight. Bob catches her, but she pretends not to know he's annoyed and follows him inside. Bob tells her their egg donor backed out, but Lee's too picky to just choose another. Bob doesn't want to lose the surrogate, too, but Lee says maybe they're not supposed to do this. Gaby hastily offers up her eggs. Bob and Lee hug her, as MAVO says, "Bad neighbors are people who make promises they can't possibly keep." Title card.

MAVO tells us about a missing girl in the morning paper. Tom reads it. So does Bree. And Angie. Then Carlos. But he quickly recycles it, as MAVO says no one really paid attention to this bit of news. "No one thinks about evil until it shows up on their doorstep, which it soon would." Someone's hands put the article into a scrapbook of "People I Killed." Okay, it doesn't say that, but it might as well. Cut to Susan, who has one type of evil showing up on her doorstep: a "thief!" Or at least that's what she runs outside accusing him of. He tries to calm her down, saying it's a repossession of Mike's truck, but she screams "fire," and the whole neighborhood comes running. Which is great for Mike, who admits he's four months behind and it is, indeed, a repossession. Hey, at least everyone knows. The best part is that Lee comes running with a fire extinguisher, in a bathrobe and towel, shouting, "Stop, drop and roll!" And Angie calls 9-1-1. Inside, Mike and Susan discuss his macho pride and unwillingness to take her money or her ex-husband's money, since she has the money from Karl's strip club. He tells her he'll figure out how to run a plumbing business without a truck. She rolls her eyes. [That is frickin' ridiculous. They're married. Do other married couples rigidly separate their finances like this? - Z]

Bree and Sam come into the office all happy and in-sync after a meeting with a publisher. Andrew calls them "the dynamic duo," which they mostly ignore and instead fill him in on Bree's new book idea: a nouvelle Southern cookbook, with a boring marketing catchphrase by Sam. Andrew quickly segues into Sam not actually having his MBA, which Sam admits readily, and explains he's still finishing it since he had to drop out to go be with his dying mother. He offers her death certificate to Andrew to save him the investigating. Even arrogant Andrew looks sheepish at that one. When Sam apologizes for misrepresenting himself, Bree says everyone crosses over the line sometimes, and then she glares at Andrew.

Desperate Housewives

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