Down at the hospital -- and just think how many Desperate scenes begin with just those words. Lynette and Tom are in the waiting room, and Lynette is holding an ice pack to her the back of her head. The silence between them is fetid, dark, and corrupt. A nurse comes in to tell Lynette that they'll only have to wait a few more minutes; the doctor is examining her CAT scan right now. The nurse retreats, and Lynette bravados that there's no need to wait around, it's just a bump. Tom, quietly: "Lynette, you were dizzy and throwing up. You can't be too careful." Yeah, that's a concussion, right? Lynette: "Yeah? Well, I feel just fine now." Wow, they sure are in rough on this one, wow, wow. In a small, small, Lilliputian voice, Tom asks how Lynette responded when Tootie told her that he had feelings for her. Lynette, in a seasoned Whatever tone, explains that she told Tootie that his feelings were "inappropriate," and then she gave him the old heave-ho. But Tom doesn't leave it there. He just keeps pushing, and he asks whether or not Lynette has feelings for Tootie. Her face goes dead, and she pretends to not have heard. Tom pushes and pushes again, and Lynette sidesteps the question by declaring that she would never cheat on Tom, which isn't really what he asked...as he readily points out. She just shakes her head, shakes and shakes it, and the "Holy Shit" music swells, and Tom gasps, "Did you fall for him!?" Lynette closes her eyes and tucks her chin and slowly lets her face crumple into grief and, also...admission! Tom, devastated: "Oh, god!" Lynette, all business now (but with red, puddled eyes), turns to Tom and says, "Nothing happened. He's gone. It's over." But Tom doesn't believe her. If it's over, then why have they been at each other's throats and scratching each other's pectorals and bonking each other's heads on the side table? Lynette reaches for his hand, but he shakes her off, all, "Not now."
And now for the cancer scare that's hopefully going to put Tom and Lynette back on the path to togetherness (because I actually do hope these two manipulative Muppet Babies stick together, I really do). The doctor comes into the waiting room, and tells them he needs to see them both. Clearly something serious is going on here, and together, Tom and Lynette nervously walk into the doctor's office. First the good news: her goose egg isn't a concussion, but just a nasty bruise. And now, the potentially catastrophic news: the CAT scan also picked up something irregular about her nymph-nodes, and the doctor needs to conduct more tests. Lynette asks if this is cancer, and the doctor allows how lymphoma might be one possible explanation, but they'll need to run a biopsy to be sure. As the doctor shows them some hilariously incomprehensible slides, the Sad and Scary music swells, and this time Tom reaches out for Lynette's hand, and she grabs it fiercely. Aw, and now I'm crying. Again.