Desperate Housewives

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 1 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Skeletor Rigby

Damn, I think I actually sort of nailed Bree back there. How disturbing. Anyway, threats of somebody else's suicide puts the girls back in form, and she marches them back out into the parlor with vino; Beth's standing there looking very determined and a little nervous, either because of (THIS IS NOT ACTUALLY A CLUE) or because she's trying to remember how to act like a person and make friends. Susan offers Beth a spot on the parlor sofa and everybody sits down, some of them on guns shoved into the couch. Well, just one really: Mrs. Paul (Beth) Young.

She pulls it out while they're pouring the gun and she's all, "What kind of party is this again?" Gaby hears Mrs. Humphries' voice whisper, "Roulette, bitches," but she keeps her lips shut tight. It's not Bree's -- "I keep all my weapons in a locker!" -- but what it is, is a .38, which is what shot Paul. And which now, she points out, spiraling upward into a paranoid squeal, has her prints on it.

How Is Gabby Formed is all about how she was sitting in that spot when they were hissing and spitting at Beth, and felt nothing, because ever since Grace left she can't feel anything at all not even in her butt, and they start saying that maybe she planted it instead, since she was the only (NOT TRUE! CLUE!) person in the parlor while they were in the kitchen laying odds on whether or not they could get her to kill herself.

Susan remembers that Beth has a gun, and Beth comes back with how she only knows that because of Halloween, when she broke into their house and tried to beat Paul to death with a club. Which nobody knew about, but is always fun to talk about, and even Susan makes a funny -- "I'm allowed to have a private life!" -- and the evidence is stacking up nowhere, really, but it's admittedly weird that the near-murder weapon showed up in Bree's couch, and the whole theme of the episode is people we ignore vs. people we don't ignore, and Bree was so intent on not ignoring Beth's pain that she went ahead and ignored the pain of the service class in the process, so the only option is Beth.

And then you got Beth honestly having a pretty strong case to believe that all five of them are trying to set her up for shooting her own husband for some reason. Just sad all around -- and I really hope this is leading to that Paul Young cat-and-mouse game where he goes after her for being a Tillman and she can't find anybody to help or save her from his misplaced rage and she's just running from house to house like Scream Queen Laurie Strode in Don't Have Sex The Babysitter's Dead, and it'll be like, Knock-knock, she'll knock, and but who's there? Not your friends, I can tell you that for sure. That scenario, I cannot stop thinking about it, it's like my favorite thing that has never happened on this show but still might. Well, that and Carlos getting flipped for real. Especially now! Now that Mrs. Humphries has been allowed into their home, anything can happen. It's Halloween every day.

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Desperate Housewives

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