Desperate Housewives
Desperate Housewives

Episode Report Card
Jessica: B | 718 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Who's That Woman?

Gabrielle's. She and Miguel are luxuriating in the tub when the doorbell rings. He freaks out. "It's Mr. Solis!" he yells as he leaps out of the tub with a huge splash. He's clearly traumatized from that time he had to roll through the rose bushes without any pants on. Gabrielle calmly points out that Carlos is unlikely to ring his own doorbell. She robes up and looks out the window. It's the cable guy. "He's three hours late," she brats. Meanwhile, Miguel frantically gets dressed and bails...forgetting an athletic sock under the bed.

House of the Crying Ejaculators. Children of the KimberBree come home, talking about their parents' marital issues. "They had a fight, a bad one," the girl says. "Like, Divorce Court bad." In the next room, KimberBree hums as she sets the table. The kids exchange a traumatized looks and agree that she's "overcompensating." They wonder what they'll do if Rex leaves them alone with her. On cue, KimberBree sails into the kitchen and announces that dinner is served. Andrew, for that is the boy's name, wonders where Rex is. KimberBree smoothly lies about a medical convention. "Take your seats," she sings. There's, like, an entire stuffed pig on the table. Not really, but I feel that moment is imminent, don't you? "This marriage is so over," the Nameless Girl says. Andrew makes a Rexean face and stomps out the back door.

Gabrielle is cleaning up the bathroom and keeping an eye on the Cable Guy, who apologizes for how late he was, claiming to have been overbooked. "How long are you going to be?" she asks. He swears he's almost done, and sniffs one of the huge candles she has arranged around the Tub of Love. "Is that sage and citrus? It's amazing," he tells her. Gabrielle just tightly suggests that he hurry, because she has stuff to do. Cable Guy agrees, and starts pulling wires out of the walls. He tugs on one of them too hard, loses his balance, and slips in a puddle of water, falling right on his ass with a yelp.

Next thing you know, Gabrielle is watching as the EMTs strap Cable Guy onto a backboard. Carlos comes home in the middle of the melee and wonders why the Cable Guy was there so late in evening. "He was running late," Gabrielle explains sadly. "He may have a concussion." The medics wheel Cable Guy out of the bathroom as Carlos looks verrrrrry skeptical and subtlely looks around the bathroom for signs of nookie.

Desperate Housewives

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