Desperate Housewives
Who's That Woman?

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Who's That Woman?

Casa Solis. Gabrielle and Carlos are in the tub, watching the news. The lead story? A gay-rights activist was beaten in his home. The gay-rights activist? Cable Guy. The man in the police sketch? Carlos. Carlos and Gabrielle both look dumbfounded. "Do you have anything you want to ask me?" Carlos asks Gabrielle carefully, after a moment. "No," she chirps, just as carefully. I can't wait until Carlos goes to prison!

Susan's. She's working on her porch in a poncho, as one does. Mrs. Kravitz comes trudging up, gripping her purse. "You took it, didn't you?" she asks, and then launches into this whole thing about how she blames herself for not hiding the cup better. "If you're capable of arson, you're capable of breaking and entering," she says. Well, Susan has proven that hypothesis to be correct. But she plays dumb. She has no idea what Mrs. Kravitz is talking about! "But yeah, I did," she smiles. Mrs. Kravitz yelps that Susan could have trusted her. "Let's not be unpleasant," she adds, and asks if they can be friends again. Susan says she doesn't think that's a good idea: "From now on, when I run into you on the street, and I say, 'Good morning, [Mrs. Kravitz],' or, 'How are you, [Mrs. Kravitz],' just know that inside I am quietly but decidedly hating your guts," she announces. Mrs. Kravitz tightens her lips and tells Susan not to say things she's going to regret. "Good evening, [Mrs. Kravitz]," Susan sings. Oh, game on. I think Susan is going to need KimberBree's help, though, because she doesn't have the killer instinct she's really going to need to take out La Kravitz. Not to mention the car-bombing experience.

Coffee Klatch. Gabrielle and Lynette relate Paul's dumb Note story, and no one buys it. They don't think Mary Alice was crazy. KimberBree says that her father, the prosecutor, always said that in cases like this, the simplest explanation is usually the right one. This concept is also known -- as I learned from Agent Mulder -- as Occam's Razor. Susan points out that this message is one sent by an enemy, not a note you leave yourself, anyway. Well, no shit, Susan. Paul's entire point was that Mary Alice was crazy, which is why she saw herself as her own enemy, which is why she left herself threatening notes. The reason that the theory is unbelievable has nothing to do with whether or not it's a note from an enemy. I am beginning to suspect that Susan is a bit dim.

Across town, Paul has brought The Note to...Shaft? Yes! It's Shaft. I've heard he's a bad mother-- sorry, I'll shut my mouth. Shaft reads The Note and wonders why Paul's hired him. Paul wants him to find out who sent it. As Shaft examines The Note, MAVO wonders who would send such a note. An enemy? Of course. But what kind? "An acquaintance? A stranger? Or how about...a neighbor that lives a few feet away?" Well, right. We sort of figured that. Her narrations ends over a shot of a house that I don't recognize, but which is clearly in the neighborhood. And we go out on our usual DUM DUM DUM DUM!

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Desperate Housewives

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