Desperate Housewives

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M. Giant: B- | Grade It Now!
You Can't Judge A Book By Its Cover

Edie has called Carlos over to pick up one of his paintings. Noticing that it looks like she put a foot through it, he obviouses, "There's a hole in it." "Yeah, I don't get modern art either," Edie says. This scene is really just an excuse for Edie to tell Carlos that if he thinks she's mad about his affair with Gabby, he should have seen Victor when he found out. As Edie closes the door on Carlos's face, he doesn't look too worried about his painting any more.

So Carlos calls Gabby to warn her, and she seems pretty sure that Victor doesn't know. Otherwise why would he be acting so sweet and taking her on a boat trip. Carlos is like, he what? Gabby: "Oh, crap." Right then is when Victor comes below. Gabby drops her cell phone in a flutter. Victor confiscates it, saying they agreed on total privacy and she can have it back when they return. Aw, isn't that sweet?

Later, Gabby finds Victor slicing up French bread with an unnecessarily large knife. She makes an excuse about wanting to go back to shore for a jacket. Victor, who I love because he has no time for anyone else's crap on this show, just comes out and tells her that he knows everything. Gabby starts apologizing, pointing out that Victor was always gone and plus she's also really needy. Victor doesn't seem impressed. He drops the knife, which doesn't calm Gaby much. From a compartment, he pulls out a big soft-sided suitcase and is opening it up. "It's bad enough you betrayed me. Now I have to listen to your whining?" He says he has something for her, but before he produces it, she blindsides him with an oar, knocking him over the side and into the ocean. And then she takes the helm and drives off, leaving him hollering and swimming uselessly after her.

Katherine seems to have come around on Dylan's father. She tells Dylan that she' written down his mother's name, date of birth, and last known address. In short, everything Dylan needs to find him. But before Katherine gives it to Dylan, she makes her promise not to bring her father there or tell him where she is. Apparently he nearly killed her last time she saw him, when she said she was leaving and taking Dylan. Katherine really works it as she tells the story. Finally, all teary, she holds out the folded piece of stationery. And suddenly it's not all that important to Dylan after all. Try to act surprised that as soon as Dylan leaves, Katherine unfolds the paper to show us that it's blank.

Lynette is out front haranguing her kids about not keeping their treehouse clean when her sisters squeal up in Lucy's car, trying to ditch their mom back at her house. This turns into what looks like it could become a big ugly row over who wants their mom the least, until Lydia suggests they bring it inside while Stella herself stands there looking thoughtful next to Lucy's car. Thoughtful and unwanted and wondering if a homeless shelter could really be that much worse than dealing with these assholes who hate her so much.

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Desperate Housewives




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