Desperate Housewives

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DeAnn Welker: B | Grade It Now!
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Stripped Down

Hospital. Bree's waiting for Orson when a nurse wheels him in. She thanks him for agreeing to see her, since he hasn't answered her calls. He says his phone was in his pants pocket, and it was on vibrate, and... you know... the paralysis. She says his doctors think he might walk again someday, and he says yes, they're upbeat and optimistic, and he wants to run them over with his chair. Bree tells Orson to come home, and he says no thanks, he'd rather be helped by a flatulent monkey, and he's going through with the divorce. She wonders why the change of heart, which is just stupid of her, since it's obviously the affair. But Orson actually says he could forgive the betrayal if it were with anyone remotely admirable, but not Karl, the most contemptible man he's ever known. He says he doesn't need her, then can't open the door while in his wheel chair, so she opens it. She tells him she's having a ramp built and he's coming home. She says they can start forgiving each other. He suggests she starts first.

In the car on the way home from Oak Ridge, Gaby says she doesn't know how Juanita doesn't know she's Mexican, since they eat Mexican food all the time. Juanita says they eat Chinese too; does that mean they're Chinese? Carlos: "No. That just means your mother doesn't like to cook." Bah-dum-bump. Gaby asks Juanita if they have to spell everything out for her; she does know she's a girl, right? Carlos scolds her, but Gaby says half the women in his family have moustaches, so she could see the confusion. They get home and send Juanita inside to play with Celia. Gaby tells her to tell her she's Mexican, too. Gaby wonders how they let the school get away, but Carlos wonders how their daughter thinks she's white. They look around the neighborhood and realize there's no one but white people.

Susan's sitting on the couch when Mike comes home and apologizes for being late; he was working on Orson's ramp. Susan asks if he has cash so she can pay the paper boy. He gives her a $20, but she stands up and we see she's just in underwear and a T-shirt. She asks if he wants to stick it in her underwear, but he'd rather put in the mailbox like usual. She says that's probably how he's used to it at Double D's, which Karl left her part ownership of. "Oh, and by the way, Destiny says hello." Mike says he can see where she's going with this, and that he's the plumber there, but sometimes he has a beer when he finishes the job. Susan asks if he looks at the girls, and he says it's completely innocent. So, he's been to a strip club; will they laugh about it or make it a thing? She's leaning toward "thing," so he says he'll come straight home next time he has a job there. Susan says he won't work there anymore, since she forbids it. He wonders what kind of marriage this is, and she says, "The kind where the husband wants to look at strippers and the wife forbids it." Mike tells her he loves her and never has or will cheat, but she's not going to tell him what he can or can't do. He leaves.

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Desperate Housewives

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