Desperate Housewives
You'll Never Get Away From Me

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You'll Never Get Away From Me

Susan walks up just as Betty is getting out of the car with a pot of flowers in her hand. Susan's ready for her lesson, and she's ready to make another push for permission to use the "drama pedal": "I think it adds grandeur." What the hell is Susan babbling about? Suddenly, we hear some frantic honking off screen, and then Karl screeches up in his cherry-red convertible. "I want to talk to you!" he yells at Susan. Leaving his car pretty much in the middle of the street, he dismounts and starts right in. Karl cannot BELIEVE that Susan kicked Edie out of Julie's performance! Susan claims, rather snottily, that Julie made that call. Karl: "Because you played the mom card!" Susan falls back on her main excuse -- that this really is a family recital, and Edie does not equal family. Karl counters that she very well could be, someday, and Susan tells him not even to joke about such things. This whole time, Betty is kind of hiding with her head in the open window of her car, almost as though she's contemplating crawling in. Karl: "How about your plumber-slash-convicted murderer, huh? He keeps popping up at [airquote]family[airquote] events!" Well played, Karl! You are swiftly becoming my new favorite character on the show. Susan: "It wasn't murder, it was manslaughter." Plus the situations aren't even remotely the same! Mike isn't living with Susan, and also? He cares about Julie. Karl: "Well, so does Edie! She was really looking forward to performing with Julie!" Susan yells that if Karl thinks Edie cares about anyone besides Edie, he is "living in a fool's paradise." Is Susan sure she isn't talking about herself, here? Because she really is the most self-centered person on this show. Besides Lynette. And Gabby. Susan goes on: "You don't know [Edie] the way I do, and the only reason she's interested in Julie is to mess with my head!" Karl gives a strange choked chortle, and then says: "That's both crazy and self-absorbed. A two-fer!" Karl! You speak for my brain, for which I thank you with much heartiness. Karl stalks off, turning to yell at Susan that Julie and Edie are great together: "And if you don't believe me, ask Julie." He peels out, and Susan tells Betty that she's sorry she had to witness that. Betty: "That's okay, hon. I have lived my share of family knock-down drag-outs." Susan: "Well, I hope it wasn't as ugly as me and Karl." Betty, bemusedly: "You'd be surprised." That was kind of a good scene!

Lynette is at the office, and her laptop's all set to teleconference with P, but -- what the hell? -- Bossy Boobs wants her to come join the staff meeting! I'm not sure why Lynette thought that Project Teleconference solved the conflict of her having to be in the meeting that morning, but whatever. Lynette tries stalling, but BB yells, "Now, now, now, now!" at her. Lynette nods and pretends to jot something in her notebook. BB backs out of Lynette's office to yell at some minion that her coffee's cold. Lynette tells P and Mom Tom, whose puzzled visages fill her screen, that's she's going to be "right back." We hear P say "Mommy?" just as Lynette trots off.

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Desperate Housewives




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