Desperate Housewives
You'll Never Get Away From Me

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You'll Never Get Away From Me

At the church jamboree, three dancing sisters in matching purple, green, and yellow flapper outfits are exiting the stage. The super-enthusiastic announcer lady says that there's going to be juice and cookies set up in the basement after the show, but first? The musical stylings of Julie and Susan Mayer! Edie and Karl are in the audience. Edie's clapping enthusiastically and Karl has his video camera out. Susan sees that Edie is clearly there to support Julie and gets a sick look on her face. Julie gets situated in front of the mic, Susan sits down at the piano, and...nothing. Susan is just sitting there, staring at Edie. After squirming there a few moments, Susan gets up and tells the audience the she just needs a few seconds: "So feel free to pray." She skittles over to Edie. Susan: "The other day when I saw you making music with my family, I got a little jealous and went a little crazy, and I pushed you out. But seeing you sitting here, today...well, I can see how much you care about Julie. And she comes first. And it should be you up there playing with her and not me. So...I'm sorry." Yes, I sure can see why Susan loves that "drama pedal." Karl, sarcastically: "Thank you, Susan." Susan starts to return to the stage, clearly thinking she's made her amends and that everything is right with the world. Edie, loud enough for all the church to hear: "How convenient that you decided this after I showed up without my guitar." Susan blusters out a little additional "sorry...wish it could be you up there," all cute. Edie: "You know I play piano?"

Cut to the mondo-enthusiastic MC: "So let's all welcome Julie Mayer and her aunt Edie!" Karl, now with Susan sitting next to him, tells Susan that she did a good thing. Susan says that she tries, but her expression is strained: doing the right thing is very uncomfortable for Susan. Edie's piano starts up, and it sounds good at first...but then there are a few strange notes, and soon it becomes apparent that she can't play at all. Julie struggles along with the song, but it sounds pretty bad. Julie glares at Edie, who sighs and says, "Give me a break! This thing has like ninety flats in it!" Susan to Karl: "Poor Julie." Karl, putting down his camera: "Stop it, you're loving this." For a second, I think he may be wrong -- maybe Susan is feeling parental sadness over the embarrassment of her daughter. But then, no. Susan leans over and lifts Karl's camera back into position. That's our selfish, selfish Susan!

Back at the slammer, Gabby is waiting in the visiting room. Carlos enters, and wearily says they told him she needed to see him. Gabby, clearly distraught: "I've been thinking. You know, about, um, everything that happened with John and...I was really selfish, and stupid, and I'm sorry. I really am sorry." Heartfelt music swells, and Carlos, with a big sigh, says, "You know what? That is the best anniversary gift that you have ever given me." Gabby, through her tears: "Actually, the one you gave me is really nice, too." Carlos gives a small "huh" look, and...scene. Nicely done, Gabby.

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Desperate Housewives

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