Desperate Housewives
Desperate Housewives

Episode Report Card
Jessica: B | 498 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Your Fault

Casa Teen Love. Julie is getting ready for the dance and rolling her eyes at her mother. "Please, why else would you want to chaperone the dance?" she asks. Susan explains that KimberBree really needed chaperones at the last minute. Julie is going to strain something, with all the eye-rolling. "You are so transparent," she sniffs. Susan promises that Julie won't even know she's there, "not too much." Then she moves into the whole sneaky If You Had A Problem Or If Something Was Weighing On Your Mind, You Would Tell Me, WOULDN'T YOU? section of the evening, but Julie smoothly lies that she tells her mother everything. Susan looks sad.

Casa Murder/Suicide. Zack, struggling to put on his tie, complains that Paul is "uprooting them," and then there's this whole bit of blocking wherein Paul is helping Zack tie his tie and it's all very "Paul could STRANGLE HIM," but I don't think Paul is going to kill Zack with his tie when there's a entire kitchen of gadgets right around the corner. Paul wonders if Zack ever talks to Julie about his mother, and Zack says he tells her all kinds of things. Like all the whack shit he's started to remember. Stuff from when he was little. Paul asks what, exactly, he remembers, and Zack says he remembers "lots of blood. Mom screaming. And Dana. I remember killing Dana." Well, off to the dance! Not really. Paul actually just says, "And you told this to Julie?" Zack explains that he trusts Julie. "Did she tell her mother?" Paul asks. Zack doesn't know. Paul sighs, and fiddles with the Tie Of Doom: "Start from the beginning. I want you to tell me everything you told Julie."

Cut to the dance, where people are grooving rhythmlessly. Zack comes over to Julie and gives her a corsage. Why on earth are they meeting at school if they live two doors down from each other?

Over by the punch bowl, KimberBree dances perkily, Susan spies on her daughter, and Paul lurks around. "What is he doing here?" Susan asks KimberBree, who tells her that Paul called and volunteered just a few hours ago. Susan thinks this is weird. "Maybe he's just trying to be supportive," KimberBree chirps. "Maybe," Susan says. I love how everyone who lives on this show, save Susan, has totally forgotten Mary Alice's mysterious death.

Ninetoes Pharmacy. Rex comes in to pick up his pills and threaten George. He opens by wondering if George has seen KimberBree lately. George confirms that he just saw her last night! They had a real nice talk. "That's all you did?" Rex asks. "Just talk?" George smiles that he and KimberBree are just friends. Rex is glad to hear it: "You know, if you ever do get a vibe from KimberBree that she's interested in more than just friendship, I'd be careful if I were you." "Excuse me?" George asks. Rex kindly explains that George should know that, if KimberBree ever put the moves on him, it would just be to even up the score with Rex: "Don't fall for it." George gives Rex a very dirty look and tells him that KimberBree is a lady, and would never use him like that. Rex sort of snorts: "Exactly. A very beautiful, classy lady. Remember, they tend to end up with doctors, not pharmacists," Rex smiles. Oh, Rex, you smug bastard. I think I love you. George smirks. "[KimberBree] is very beautiful and very classy, but she's not very perceptive," he says. "For instance, she thinks you're a good person and it's now very clear to me, you aren't." Rex just calmly announces that he'd like his prescription now. George pretends not to find them, of course, so that he can swap them out for something that will kill poor Rex, or, at the very least, send him to Comaville. Just a speculation. Although I would like to say that, if Rex dies, my rage will be powerful.

Desperate Housewives

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