Desperate Housewives
Your Fault

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Jessica: B- | Grade It Now!
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Your Fault

Instead, Gay Matt goes downstairs, where he finds Ryan O'Neal. Neither of them can sleep. Ryan O'Neal is so sorry for waking the dragon within Lynette, but Gay Matt tells him he's not upset about that. "There's something that Lynette doesn't know about, Dad," he says, very seriously. "Something that I did. And don't know what's going to happen if she ever finds out." I hope it turns out that he works as a hired killer. And that Lynette is next victim!

Oh, right, Gabrielle. She gives Miguel his ring back, and he responds by throwing a vase at the wall. He loves her! Love isn't enough! Where would they live? How would they live? How, Miguel, how? Miguel makes that tired old Poor But Happy argument, and Gabrielle tells him she's tried that. She wasn't so happy. Miguel points out that Carlos is probably going to the Big House, and asks if she really plan on waiting around for him. Gabrielle shrugs. "Every once in a while, even I want to do the right thing," she tells him. But Miguel loves her: "Doesn't that mean anything?" Gabrielle turns away him and lies that no, it doesn't: "You were a toy. A sweet, dumb toy. So you might as well go to college, because you and me? No future." Miguel storms out in a heartbroken huff, and Gabrielle tries not to sob. I feel like they've both already done that scene like nine times, back when they were on day time soaps. For example, Miguel's girlfriend Charity had to break off their engagement after she promised Death that she would give up Miguel if Death would spare the life of the baby Miguel had with Charity's cousin Kay, who had cast a spell on herself so that she would look just like Charity and therefore be able to con Miguel into boning her. This was very much like that.

Zack shows up at Susan's, looking for Julie. Susan tells him she's in the shower. He pushes his way in and announces that he and his father are not moving: "So I guess we're going to keep living across the street." Yes, that follows, brainiac. Susan is shocked, and tells him that they need to talk. She informs him, nicely, that Julie is only fourteen. And she's not mature enough to make the right decisions. Susan has to protect Julie -- not from Zack, exactly, she explains. She thinks Zack and Julie need to slow down: "I want you to not see her for a while." Zack leaps up. "You're not taking her away from me," he announces. Susan, sort of amused, tells him not to be so dramatic, so he takes her advice and throws a table across the room. "Do you think this is funny?" he yells. Susan, freaked out, gasps that he's making this very easy for her. She forbids him to see or talk to Julie, and tells him that if he comes around again, she will call the police. And she throws him out. I have to say, I'm kind of with Susan here. He's a nutbag.

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Desperate Housewives

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