Dexter

Episode Report Card
Mr. Stupidhead: A- | 1458 USERS: B
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Death Of A Salesman

"So, I'm a Fed. My suit proves it," says Lundy to a room filled with his task force. "The other suits here are Feds. But, suit or...[looking at Angel] ugly Hawaiian shirt -- no offense -- we're a team, and our first play is identifying those bodies." He continues to say that once they know who the bodies belong to, they can fill in all the details of their lives, "from their huevos rancheros to their creme brulée." Um, okay. He mentions that Masuka and his team are going through prints and dental records, while this team right here is going to work on cold cases, missing person files, and interviewing the massive crowd outside, despite the fact that most of them will be a total waste of time. "Negative thinking," says Angel to Deb, who rolls her eyes with me.

Dexter's at a Ford car lot, VOing, "When the manhunt is on, the hunted go shopping. Not for a new car, for my next project. I won't act on it...yet. I'm still laying low; Harry would insist on that. Just getting the research out of the way." Dexter's investigating a minivan, and it gets 33 miles per gallon, which is pretty amazing for a big ride like that. Flashing on a crime scene, he continues, "Someone talked his way into the homes of two women and didn't leave until they were dead. Ann Cohen, and a month before her, Lynn Hall. A certain car dealership ran credit checks on both women. Both bought cars elsewhere so nobody thought about it twice. But who requested those credit checks? Roger Hicks." A guy who I'm assuming is Hicks is slicking his way around with some potential customer, smiling in that way only car salesman do. As he takes a slow-motion sip of coffee, Dex VOs that all he needs is some DNA proof. "Cup of coffee should do the trick." Dexter begins exploring another minivan, and it gets Hicks's attention, as I imagine he planned. "How many kids you got?" "Heh. Enough," replies Dex. "I hear ya! When my two came along, it was 'bye-bye, convertible,'" says Hicks as he places his coffee cup on the roof. "Of course, they're worth it," he says, and shows Dex a picture of them on his phone. "Must take after their mom," says Dex, knowing full well this guy doesn't actually have kids. "That they do, thank God!" laughs Hicks, before going into the hard sell, with the DVD headrests. He even goes so far as to say that, since he owns the same model (my ass), he thinks the ride is even smoother than his old convertible. Whatever, dude. How do we know your old convertible wasn't some clunker with the roof hacked off? "My wife loves the nav system and all the safety features, and when they're happy..." "You're happy." "Except the kids don't exist," Dex VOs as he checks out the van. "Neither does the wife. And he owns a Beamer, not a minivan. Still, he's seamless." Hicks quickly takes his coffee cup and chucks it in the trash bag of one of his maintenance guys, making it pretty awkward for Dexter to grab his DNA that way. Luckily, Dex notices Hicks's comb in his jacket pocket, which is sitting on a seat in the van, and snags it as Roger pulls the car's specs for him. Dexter says he thinks he has all the info he needs to make a decision, and I guess Ford and Showtime have some kind of deal, because Roger brings up the "stow-and-go seating system," which he demonstrates. "I have had everything in here from a soccer team to a deer carcass. It was an accident, of course, but I sure was glad for the ample cargo space, not to mention the tinted windows." Dexter looks enamored. "I can see how that might come in handy." "I'll just grab the keys!" says Hicks, excited, and he runs inside, totally sweaty, and nerdily high-fives another salesman on the way. Hilarious.

Dexter

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