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Mr. Stupidhead: B+ | Grade It Now!
Dex And The Maiden

Dex pulls his minivan up to the train yard, and the "victim" is inside an ambulance, telling his story. "He knocked me out, and then when I woke up, I was tied up in that train car over there." "You said he used rope?" asks Lundy. "Dumb fuck. I stretched it out enough so that I could get my legs free and then busted out of there." Having watched all this, Dex VOs, "So that's the alleged victim of the Bay Harbor Butcher? But I've never seen him before in my life." Angel calls over to Dexter and motions for him to cross the police tape and come check out the scene. Angel says that Lundy wants him to check the train car for trace evidence. "Your spidey sense tingling, yet?" he asks. "We'll see when I get inside," says Dex. "Take your time in there," says Angel, suddenly very serious. "We've never been this close to this pendejo." Looking at Angel's hand on his shoulder, Dex VOs, "Closer than you think, amigo." Heh, true. Dexter takes a short tour around the train car, noticing the stuff that's already been tagged by forensics. "He may have borrowed my pseudonym, but this guy doesn't know the first thing about my techniques. Amateur."

Back with the "victim," Deb is asking him what made him think it was the BHB. "Well, he told me that the Bay Harbor Butcher's gonna clean up Miami. He said, 'You're gonna get what you deserve.'" "And what do you deserve, Mr. Henry?" asks Lundy. Mr. Henry goes on to explain that he just got out of the pen for knocking over old folks homes. Jeez, what a scum-bag. Deb asks if he ever killed anyone, and the guy says he once gave an old timer a heart attack. A skeptical Lundy tells Deb to keep an eye on this guy while he confers with Dexter. Deb, looking hurt (shut up, Deb), says, "Yeah, sure" as Lundy steps out.

"Killing tools left behind? I'd never be this careless," Dex VOs. "Whoever did this would never pass Harry's muster. Then again, neither would Harry. He lied about my past, he cheated on my foster mother with my biological mother. Maybe Lila's right: it's time for a new set of standards." "If you were the Bay Harbor Butcher, would you use a place like this?" Lundy asks Dexter. "Actually, yes," replies Dex. "Uh, location-wise, it's not a bad choice. It's quiet, remote. Could use an upgrade in the lighting department, but..." He turns around and starts taking out his photo equipment piece by piece, methodically placing each component in an organized fashion on the table. Lundy wonders aloud if Dexter thinks this is "our guy?" "Not exactly," says Dex, wheeling around. "From what I understand, the conditions in this space don't support his MO. It's filthy, for one thing." "Butcher's clean," says Lundy. "Orderly." Then, after watching Dexter organize his photo gear: "Some people would say compulsive." "Really, you think he's compulsive?" asks Dex. Lundy comments on the hatchet on the ground: "A hatchet is sloppy. The Butcher uses precise, surgical instruments." Dexter asks if the BHB is that predictable: "He uses different instruments every time, switches it up?" Lundy mentions that he never uses rope, only duct-tape and plastic wrap. "Plastic wrap? How can you tell?" "Depression patterns in the skin. Maybe the Butcher's having an identity crisis." "It's entirely possible," says Dex. Heh. "Not likely. My guess is we're looking for a vigilante inspired by the Butcher's principles. Bet he never thought he'd be a role-model." "I bet you're right," says Dex with a smile. Dex then asks if there are any new leads on the actual BHB, and Lundy says not yet, but he's hoping the marina surveillance will turn something new up. "Good news for all the cops who have boats at Corral Cove. You've got one, too, right?" Dexter flashed back on cleaning up his boat, and says, "Yeah, we've been needing a security upgrade for a long time, now." Lundy takes off without a word, and Dex VOs, "Has Lundy seen me on the tape? Is that why he invited me along today? To mess with me?"

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