Episode Report Card
Mr. Stupidhead: B+ | Grade It Now!
Dex And The Maiden

Down at the station, Dex goes to Deb, "Hey, I'm sorry if I was short with you this morning. I'm lost without my morning coffee." "Whatever," she says, obviously jealous of the affection he's receiving from Lundy. "How was your play date with Lundy? Did you bond?" Ugh, shut up, Deb! Ignoring this, Dex says he didn't know about the security cameras at the marinas, and Deb says, "It's not like they're doing us any good. We have to update the station's computer system before we can sync up with Lundy's hi-tech equipment." "So the cameras aren't recording?" "Well, they are, but nobody's seen any of the footage." Interesting. Apparently it's going to be fixed this evening.

At the beach, Dexter's playing with Cody on the beach, and Mama says, "Looks like Cody's enjoying himself. Dexter's very patient with him." "Dexter's a saint," says Rita. Dexter walks up and asks where Astor is, because he wants to say goodbye before he goes to meet Lila. "Who's Lila?" asks Mama when Dexter goes to say bye to Astor. "His sponsor." "Really? A woman?" "Yes, Mom. Dexter's sponsor is a woman. Is that a problem?" You tell us, Rita. "Is she attractive?" Mama asks, and Rita gets annoyed. "I'm just curious! Is she?" Dexter returns before Rita can answer, and Mama suggests having Lila over for some dinner. Dexter tries to demur, but Mama presses the issue: "I think it'd be nice if we got to know the woman you've been spending so much time with." Dexter's got nothin'.

Dexter's setting the table, and Rita comes up with a couple of plates of food. "Here, let me help," says Lila, who literally just grabs a plate of asparagus and wheels around and plops it on the table, not really helping at all. They all sit down, and Lila thanks Rita for having her. "Now I can put names to faces. Dexter talks about you all the time." "Good things, I hope," says Rita as she grabs Dexter's hand. "Dex never says a bad word about anyone." Mama joins her hands in prayer mode, and everyone else follows suit. As Dexter cuts his meat, Mama says, "Tell me, Lila, what exactly are you recovering from?" "I'm a meth addict," she says matter-of-factly. "Sober five years." "I don't know much about meth. Rita's ex-husband shot heroin." "Like Dexter!" she says a bit too enthusiastically. "Guess we know your type, don't we?" Lila says to Rita, joking around. "Just can't seem to help myself," Rita responds in kind. This is all a little too tense. I fucking hate situations like this, where worlds collide. Sometimes it can be a bit much. "You have nothing to worry about, with Dexter, I mean," Lila says to Mama. "I'm sitting right here," says Dex, peeved. Lila assures both women that Dexter's doing exceedingly well in the program, "and I'm sure it's got everything to do with the two of you. From what he tells me, you're very supportive. Dexter's lucky to have you." Rita says that's sweet of her to say, and Dexter smiles because everything's going so swimmingly. They talk briefly about Lila's artwork, and she mentions the budding artist in Dexter, referring, of course, to the blood spatter thing. Dexter points this out, and Mama takes the opportunity to jab: "What kind of career choice is blood spatter, exactly?" "He helps catch criminals, mother," says Rita, annoyed. "It makes perfect sense, really, what with Dexter's mother and everything," says Lila. Whoa, dude. That was extra big-ass not awesome. Take it back. After a palpable silence, Lila covers by saying, "You know, she's dead." Yeah, too little, too late, methinks. Dexter sighs, and says, "Forgot the bread." Awkward!

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