Dexter
Dexter

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: B+ | 268 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
Bad Santa

Isaak Pullo tells the guy that he could retaliate, but then a bunch of his guys would pay them back ten times over. "We outnumber you. We outgun you. Quite frankly, we're smarter than you." Well, forgive me for saying so, Isaak Pullo, but if that's the case, you're not exactly explaining how the Colombians managed to yank the Miami heroin business from you. As Isaak Pullo finishes breaking "the guy's" wrist and the Colombian wins no acting awards for his portrayal of someone in that much pain, Isaak Pullo asks if they've come to terms. When he receives a choked affirmative, he smiles, but any mirth is dropped once he steps away and removes a cell phone from the depths of his uniform. He leaves a message for Jason Gedrick informing him that it's "urgent" that he pay him a visit, and I can just picture Jason Gedrick picking up that message while on the toilet and running out with his pants still around his ankles.

In the morning, Dexter tries knocking on Hannah's door and is puzzled by the lack of an answer, given that he's apparently been watching her for days and she hasn't varied her schedule. He heads out back and finds her digging a hole for a dead rabbit in her hand, and is like, "Heyyyyy, interesting!" She explains that since rabbits kill her plants, she sometimes takes it upon herself to poison them, which is the only way to get rid of them permanently. Dexter tells her to remind him not to show up uninvited, then, and boy, he must not have had any coffee for days if he doesn't see this response coming: "Too late." Hannah, fairly mildly, notes that Dexter's accused her of murder and animal cruelty; is there anything else he'd like to add? Dexter, feigning sheepish conciliation, apologizes and says he was wrong, handing over a copy of his report and saying it showed the blood evidence was inconclusive. Obviously, it seems unlikely that that could be the case, given how Dexter nailed her participation down to the scar on her hand, but he could be counting on her to realize this as part of his plan. With an inscrutable smile, she tells him it takes a real gentleman to admit when he's wrong, and some subtextual talk about dirt then forces DVO to tell himself to snap out of staring at her, like, dude, I know you're weird but I thought you were pretty clearly het? This is Yvonne Strahovski we're talking about; I'm a Kinsey 6 and I'm not exactly not interested.

Dexter

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