Episode Report Card
admin: A- | 4 USERS: A
Crappy Thanksgiving

He finds Arthur and Jonah, looking peaceful, and says he just got a call and he thinks he has to... But then he sees Jonah taping up his fingers and asks what happens. Jonah says he whacked it on the coffee table, and Arthur says, "My son, the klutz, this team hasn't been the same since they traded Johnson." He actually said it like that, as if it's one thought. Jonah gives Dexter a look, and DVO wonders what else Arthur will do to Jonah if he leaves. So he sits back down and eats a chip.

Let the boredom commence, because Angel and LaGuerta are sitting near the beach discussing their Thanksgiving dinner: turkey wraps, ICEEs and Cuervo. Seriously, that doesn't sound bad. Although it's the only thing about this scene that doesn't. Angel's struggling with the fleeting nature of life and love after finding the victim's husband in a vegetative state, so he tells Maria he loves her. She takes his sunglasses off and wonders if he's worried he'll get hit by a bus. He says yes, but he means it. He starts shouting and says, "I love Maria Esparanza Di Alma LaGuer..." But she covers his mouth and tells him she's not going to say it. He asks if she doesn't love him, and she cries that she's afraid if she says it something bad will happen, like he'll get hit by a bus (foreshadowing? Is Angel going to get hit by a bus?). She kisses him and tells him to watch out for buses because, "I love Angel Juan Marcos Batista." They kiss. And I wonder why this matters, or what it might have to do with anything at any time this season, other than that they will possibly get fired over it.

Elliott's kitchen. Rita burns herself, and Elliott swoops in to help her get her hand under the faucet, and to get her frozen peas. Because that's stuff she couldn't do on her own, but it lets him make yet another dumb joke -- "Come on, Rita, give peas a chance." Then he makes fun of her for saying "Rats!" when she burnt herself. He says he likes taking care of her and leans in for a kiss. She actually completely kisses back for a moment, but then jumps away, and he apologizes, and says they have a connection that's more than both of them being lonely. She says she's not lonely; she has Dexter. Elliott: "The guy who's never home?" She storms out, and then the camera pans outside, where Masuka showed up to bake his lava cakes and saw the whole thing. He sneaks away and throws his cakes in the trash. Then he goes back and tells Deb he's not feeling hot and needs to take off. She says he can't; he's her wingman. She says she'll be the one single person here if he leaves (what about girlfriendless Elliott?). He says he needs booze, and she's on board with that. Masuka sits down with Astor and Harrison. Astor asks him if he's the one her mom told her not to talk to. He just says, "Awkward."

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