Dexter

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Mr. Stupidhead: B | Grade It Now!
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"Dex Will Tremble To Take Us."

LaGuerta asks Doakes if he has any "Misdemeanor A" forms, and he snaps at her to look in the file cabinet. Deb walks in as LaGuerta yells if anyone could tell her where the "goddamn Misdemeanor A forms are," and says she has some. Everyone claps for her, and she tells everyone to can it: "It's just another fuckin' day at work." LaGuerta stands up, and they share a moment. "Welcome back, Morgan," Maria says earnestly. Deb thanks her, and gives her a hug, which is certainly out of character for her. LaGuerta looks shocked. "Maria," a female voice says, and LaGuerta wheels around to see Lt. Pascal motioning for her to come into her office, which she does. Once Maria's in there, Pascal tells her that there was a body discovered "down at the breakwater," and that she wants her to take Doakes and Deb, who needs to get back out in the field. "She's not ready," says Maria, shutting the door behind her. "She shouldn't even be here. What's it been, five weeks? Six?" Pascal says that her psych evaluation showed that she's ready to get back out. Maria pushes the issue, but Pascal isn't really hearing it. "She could melt down, freak out. She hugged me." "Alright, well, then, you partner with her today so that you can keep an eye on her." "That's --" "...Not a request," Pascal says coldly. Maria realizes there's no point fighting it, and starts to head out, when Pascal says, "Maria, I know that it's difficult for you to take orders when you feel that you should be giving them. I really appreciate your professionalism." Yikes, that was kind of unnecessarily bitchy of her. I thought that they were cool with each other. Maria sheepishly thanks her, and then notices a bunch of red roses in Pascal's trash bin. "You don't like roses?" she asks. "Allergies," Pascal replies stonily, and then dismisses LaGuerta: "Let me know what you find out about that body."

Down at the breakwater, there's a bloody body laying on the rocks. Doakes and Angel keep watch over it as Masuka and Dexter cross the police tape. "Heard your sister's back on the job, already," says Masuka. "Is she in any kind of shape?" "You know Deb, nothing gets her down." Oh, Dexter. You should always assume that whatever Masuka says should be construed in the perviest way possible. "No, I mean, did she pack on any pounds while she was gone, because, you know, last time I saw her, she was tight." Jesus, Vince. A little tact? Oh, what am I saying? Dexter just shakes his head. As they approach the body, Angel informs them that it has "multiple chop wounds, pretty much head-to-toe." Vince wants to flip a coin for who has to inspect the body, and Dex calls heads, even though he's already down at the body. Masuka ditches the coin toss, and joins him. "We've got sharp force trauma, here," he notices. "Heavy impact parallel wounds, maybe an axe." Dexter debunks that idea by explaining that the defensive wounds on the forearms are "long and linear," and were most likely caused by a machete. Hearing this, Doakes says that the machete is "the weapon of choice for the 29th Street Kings," a gang that the victim has a tattoo of on the back of his neck. Angel asserts his belief that the body was carried from another location as Dexter struggles with his camera. Angel tells him to take off the lens cap. Man, Dex is seriously distracted. Doakes says they should check the dock slips to make sure none of the boat owners in the area could have had something to do with the body, but Dexter debunks this, as well, by saying, "Maybe it was just an easy access spot to dump a corpse at night. There are no light-poles, and the freeway exit ramp is just a block away." Angel nods his head in agreement, but Doakes gives Dex his par-for-the-course ice-grille. "Yo, Dex," says Masuka, pointing at Dexter's foot, which is placed right in a pool of the corpse's blood. "You're supposed to preserve the crime scene, asshole," surls Doakes as he storms off. Angel asks what the matter with Dex is, and he responds that his game is just off. "I'll get it back."

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Dexter

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