CBS Channel 4 in Miami is still reporting on the manhunt for Tony Tucci, our supposed Ice Truck Killer (even though it's obviously not him), and LaGuerta is telling someone on the phone to "tell the fuckin' governor to free up some funds for overtime. I mean, the more guys I got out there, the sooner we'll find Tucci." I'll free up your funds, jerkwater! Astor walks in with a sober look on his grill, and shuts the door behind him, and LaGuerta hangs up the phone. "What's wrong?" she asks him. "Fingerprint came back from that hand on the beach. It belongs to Tony Tucci." Oh, snap! Suck on that, LaGuerta! What, are you gonna say he cut off his own hand to throw you off his scent? Not pleased, she's all, "No, no. No way. No. Way! This has to be a mistake!" "The mistake, Maria, was unleashing a high-profile manhunt before you had all the facts." That's right, beeyotch! "Fuck!" Yes, "fuck" indeed. Astor just watches her while giving her a pretty frosty glare. "Okay," she continues, "this doesn't mean that Tucci's not the killer..." "Don't. Just...just don't," says Astor. "You want to be on TV? Well, get ready. The press will annihilate us for this. You'll be lucky if Tucci's mother doesn't sign a lawsuit." Yeah, dude. You guys are pretty boned. Astor tells her to go talk to "that woman," by whom I'm assuming he means Tucci's mother. "Hopefully we can mitigate the fallout." LaGuerta is hesitant, because she called her son a killer, and Astor tells her to suck it up and make it right. He takes off, leaving her to her thoughts, which I hope sound something like, "Jesus, dude, I really suck. Like, so hard. I'm such a power-hungry douche-nozzle that I can barely stand my own existence. I wonder what Dexter's doing right now? I love him, but he's too good for me. I should just end it all right now..."
Episode Report CardMr. Stupidhead: B+ | 814 USERS: C+
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