Dexter

Episode Report Card
Mr. Stupidhead: B | 2 USERS: A
YOU GRADE IT
"Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of Dex..."

...Dexter, the next day, who's staring at a soccer ball outside an office park. Not just any soccer ball, mind you, but one that is sitting next to a cleat-wearing severed foot. Hmm. "Another picture from my family album," Dex VOs. "He's recreating my past with Tony Tucci's body parts." Yeah, that's pretty sadistic. "Nobody's payin' you to stand around and goddamn stare!" Doakes chimes in, jolting Dexter back to reality. Dexter tries to remind him that "Angel was supposed to be working this case," but yet again, Doakes is more concerned with the intimidating-looking dudes from Guerrero's crew, who are back with their big truck, across the marsh, giving Doakes the ice-grill. "Friends of yours?" asks Dex, and Doakes quickly responds, "Don't worry about it. Worry about this." Dexter notes aloud the precise cuts, and Doakes wants to know why, after body after body with no blood, the ITK is changing it up. Dexter wings it: "He's trying to send a message. One that's more important than his ritual need to drain the blood and wrap the parts." "Okay, so what's the message?" "Not sure." "Well, who's he sendin' it to?" "I can't tell you that, either..." "Well, what fuckin' good are you?" Heh. Nice one, Doakes. Dexter's distraught, and puts his hand to his face. Angel asks him what's wrong, and he says, "He's mocking me." "Don't take it personally. Doakes hates all you lab geeks." "Who?" asks Dex, realizing that he almost just blew his cover to Angel. Whoops! Dexter moves in to grab the soccer ball as evidence, and when he does, another Polaroid is revealed, this time of the foot and ball together. After a long pause, Angel takes off, and Dex VOs, "He knows. He's not corrupting the happy Hallmark images of my youth. He's revealing the ugly truth behind them." Whoa, dude. How can he do that? He wasn't there, at the beach, listening in to your man-to-man with Harry. Or at this upcoming flashback, when you were at...

...soccer practice, teasing poor old Simon by playing keep-away with your "friends," using his jersey as bait. Harry puts an end to poor Simon's suffering by grabbing the jersey from Dexter and giving it back. He pulls Dexter aside all, "What the hell is going on?" Dexter explains that he's just trying to fit in by being a part of the team. "You can't be a bully, Dexter. First of all, it's wrong. Secondly, people remember bullies." It's true, Chad Delaney. You think I forgot that neck slap at the foursquare court? Eat shit and die, prick! Sorry. ["I'm not. We didn't call that dude 'Choad Del-anus' for nothing. Prick." -- Sars] Anyway, Harry goes on to explain that to people like himself, "cops, a bully is a felony waiting to happen. So...?" "Blend in." Apparently, that's the right answer, because Harry smiles and sends Dexter back onto the field. I don't remember anyone taking a picture, though.

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Dexter

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