Dexter
Ricochet Rabbit

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: D | Grade It Now!
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Cloudy With A Chance Of Poison Gas

There's also a conversation with Harry about Mos Def and faith and other bullshit, and Dexter says the F-word before getting a text from Deb, telling him the police are canvassing a one-mile radius around the IP address from EJO's blog, like, (a), why would she bother telling Dexter that if he's not involved in the search, and (b) THEY SHOULD HAVE EVERY SINGLE FUCKING COP IN MIAMI ON THIS! As we'll see, it's going to end up taking them at least, I would say, sixteen hours to make it to the ABANDONED CHURCH, which was within visual range of the circle's midpoint and also, you'd think, MIGHT MAKE A GOOD HIDEOUT. This show, seriously, and its glaring deficiencies in logic and continuity wouldn't be so apparent if the pacing weren't glacial.

Harry claims that the police are "closing in," like, that's not exactly how I'd put it, guy, but he does suggest that Dexter might want to get out of the way and let the police handle this. Dexter, however, does not want to hear this, and then decides that if the cops find EJO, they'll focus their hunt on Colin Hanks, so he's going to dispose of EJO's corpse, which MAKES NO SENSE and THIS IS PAINFUL and Colin Hanks DEPARTED THE SCENE NOT FIVE MINUTES AGO AND ALSO DIDN'T HAVE A CAR, don't you think it might be worth TRYING TO CATCH HIM NOW INSTEAD OF WORRYING ABOUT THIS BULLSHIT? No, not only does Dexter not do that, but he cuts off EJO's hand so he can leave his fingerprints all over the scene, like yes, that is definitely an efficient use of his time.

As he carries out his grisly plan, he muses that all he has to do is finish this up and then strike the kill room, and he really so much deserves for the police to walk in on him right at this moment. I mean, it's not like he'd have any notice, and also his car is still parked outside for them to stumble upon, but sure, take your time, Dexter. Also, Dexter decides that EJO's hand helped him once, so he'll just stash it in the morgue for a rainy day, like AUUUUUGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH how does that make ANY sense? And he didn't even take the opportunity to say that it might "come in handy" down the line! If I give this episode another F, it's because the first eight minutes earned a Z. (Actually, I'm only upping the grade to a D because I liked the Deb stuff this week -- everything else made excrement smell good by comparison.)

It's morning -- MORNING -- by the time Dexter makes it to the Colon, and finds Colin Hanks's laptop, like, of course he'd have left it on and logged in so Dexter can post as the administrator, and he writes that he was wrong and "this" was all the Devil's errand. Meanwhile, Colin Hanks has gone to something called an "Internet café" and is also checking the blog, as if he wouldn't have logged in as EJO himself, and looks at all the video comments (as IF) and comes across one we saw last week from a "Doomsday_Adam," so I guess "Doomsday Adam" was already taken. Doomsday_Adam, a lazy-eyed freak, pledges his support to EJO, so Colin Hanks sends him an email, which, if I understand correctly, is how Jesus recruited the Apostles as well. While he's waiting for a response, he sees Dexter's lame post, and instead of taking it down, he replies "to the False Prophet" that he's "not fooling anyone." Of course, he's just going to sound like a crackpot commenter, but there is no way I can care...

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Dexter

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