Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: B+ | 2 USERS: A+
Up In Smoke

Dexter comes to in some industrial building with metal fencing and other ominous stuff around him, and DVO continues its upward mobility: "I'm still alive, but I don't think I'm going to like the reason why."Heh. Looking around at the setup, Dexter notes that he couldn't have gotten this place together in the time he was unconscious, but he doesn't have time to ponder that, as he opens an envelope that's been left in a prominent place for him. The note inside, much like the one last week, says "Run," and although DVO tries to Walter White that he is the one that makes people run, the appearance of Speltzer in that helmet dragging an axe along the wall like he's looking to become the next slasher franchise gives some nuance to his viewpoint: "I do run if there's a bull coming after me with an axe." DVO, you're off probation.

Dexter's true to his voiceover, and zips through the obstacles in his path as carefully as he can, with Speltzer hot on his tail. He enters a stairwell and balks for a moment at the open elevator shaft, the car down below, but when Speltzer catches up to him, Dexter has no choice but to jump and wrap himself around the elevator cable. He quickly slides down it, and after looking up and seeing Speltzer peering down at him, rushes out onto the lower level...into a room full of mannequins bathed only in stroboscopic light, and okay, this probably isn't entirely original but it's pretty fucking creepy. Dexter keeps himself moving, and across the room, he sees something that looks like Speltzer's bull mask, but as he moves to "sneak up" on it, you can see Speltzer move behind him and it's pretty goddamn tense, no lie. When Dexter gets close enough, he can see that it actually is Speltzer's mask - he's just not currently in it. Instead of panicking, though, he pauses - and when Speltzer swings the axe at him, he leans in the other direction, evading the blow. Even Speltzer can't swing a heavy axe without losing his balance in the follow-through, and Dexter gets on top of him with an explanation of how he dodged that bullet: "You should really try taking a shower once in a while." Well, I reckon he was pretty busy while you were asleep. Speltzer flips Dexter off him, and when Dexter gets back on his feet, his adversary is nowhere to be seen. Rather than try to rely on the same trick twice, he takes a chance on one of the room's exits...

...and finds himself in another stairwell, with the "up" offering boarded up. DVO astutely notes that Speltzer seems to want him to go further down, so it might be the smart idea to head up instead; as such, he uses some metal pole he picked up in the mannequin room to bust open the barrier and moves. Speltzer ends up hot on his tail, but Dexter makes it to the roof, and is then able to navigate his way down and hitch a ride on the back of a passing car-carrying truck before Speltzer can catch him. DVO realizes that Speltzer knows his face now, and as such, if he wants a "rematch" he's going to have to be smarter. Well, among other things, I'd suggest the rematch not take place anywhere that Speltzer has been allowed to CONVERT INTO A DEATH MAZE. (Honestly, though, the one in the attic last week was ten times worse.) Dexter then gets another look of realization on his face, and DVO explains that in order to take Speltzer down, he's going to have to make sure he (Dexter) has nothing to lose...

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