Dexter

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Mr. Stupidhead: B+ | Grade It Now!
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A Deb'll Do Ya

Previously: Harry ascertained that Dexter didn't remember anything about what happened to him as a young tot. Dexter's relaxation session with his therapist opened his mind's eye, and gave him some insight into what may have happened. Joe Driscoll, Dexter's biological father, died and left him his house. Deb decided to use the occasion to introduce Dexter to her boyfriend Rudy, who also just happens to be the Ice Truck Killer. No matter, because he was under the impression that she was "falling for him." She probably still is. Rita got the FOP to sign the damn divorce papers, already, and FOP almost punched Dexter. Continuing his violent streak, he tried to rape Rita, who decided to have batting practice on his face, which was awesome.

Dexter's getting the kids ready for school as a locksmith changes the locks on the doors. Rita comes in, flustered, and asks about breakfast. "Made and eaten," replies Dexter, showing her he's got it covered. "The kids' lunches?" "Packed and ready to go." Dexter's also told the locksmith exactly what to do. "Reenforced strike plates, seven-pin key ways..." He hands the kids their backpacks and tells them to go wait in his car because he wants to talk with Rita. Astor asks if they're going to make out, and Dexter and Rita both tell her it's none of her business, so she and Cody go outside. "Rita, you don't have to do this. Getting attacked by your ex-husband merits a day off." She tells Dexter that she's not going to let Paul control her life anymore, and Dexter reassures her that the hunt for Paul is on, and that the cops will find him. "What if they don't?" she asks. Fair enough. Even Dexter knows that they're a pretty dismal force. He hands Rita some pepper spray and tells her to aim for the eyes.

Deb is eating some cake at the station, and she asks Doakes if he wants some. He says no and tells her the cake's ten days old, from some dude's birthday. "You have lunch every day with your boyfriend, you miss a thing or two around here." Whatever Doakes. She's in love! Barf. Some girl is opening a package at another desk and pulls out a glass jar that's filled with some black liquid. "Guys, you should look at this!" she says. Doakes tells the girl to put the jar down. "Jesus, is that blood?" asks Deb. "Morgan, get your ass over here!" Doakes yells at Dex. "Ass en route," says Dexter, trying to seem normal. Doakes asks him what's in there, and he replies that it's "a little watery for jam." "Maybe you should open it," smarms the girl who opened the package. "What if there's an airborne toxin in here, waiting to be released?" says Dex, freaking the girl out. She leaves to wash her hands, which is good because she was already annoying me with her stupid pink sweater and shitty attitude. Dexter inspects the jar more closely, and LaGuerta asks what it is. "It's definitely blood," he says. "Wait, there's something in here..." Apparently, it's a room key for the Marina View Hotel. "Maybe it's some promotional gag, like you stay for a weekend, you get a free jar of blood." Heh. Probably not. LaGuerta says that "show and tell's over," and she wants to start figuring out who sent this thing. Doakes and Deb are on it together after it's revealed unimportantly that Angel is working some exploding meth-lab case. Dexter remains, VOing, "A jar of blood. Dramatic, cryptic...playful. Could it be him?"

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Dexter

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