Dexter

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The Age of Innocents

That night, Quinn helps Debra move her stuff into her new apartment. He cocks an incredulous eyebrow when she tells him it used to belong to Dexter. "What'd he use it as a fuck pad?" Deb's like, "Obviously not," because she's still not asking questions yet. As Quinn leaves, he runs into Dexter and taunts him about what kind of a heel gets married and holds on to his old apartment. He asks Dex what he's hiding, and Dexter, with pronounced calm, tells Quinn to stay out of his life. I'm putting it at about 50/50 now between "Quinn's fucking with Dexter" and "Quinn is starting to believe Dexter's hiding something serious." Inside, Dexter asks Deb if she's always going to have people over to her new apartment. Aw, yeah, that's kinda out of your hands now, Dex. Deb shows off everything she's gathered about the Trinity investigation. She's ready to take it to LaGuerta tomorrow, including her theory that Trinity killed Lundy and shot her. Deb's sure LaGuerta's gonna flip for it, while DVO is sure LaGuerta will find the whole thing paranoid and farfetched. Dex also finds Deb's stack of Harry's old C.I. files. He presses her about this particular investigation, and he's nonplussed when she tells him the woman she thinks Harry was sleeping with is some old bag she's having coffee with tomorrow. Dex is momentarily relieved Deb hasn't stumbled upon Laura Moser's file yet, but once she does, that's a slippery slope, down past Brian Moser, the Ice Truck Killer, Harry's code, and finally Dexter the avenging angel. Not a bit of which Debra wants to know. As he unconsciously moves toward the A/C unit that once housed his blood samples, almost like he's guarding it (nice subtle touch, that), Dexter tries his hardest to be nonchalant as he asks Deb to keep him posted.

Back home, Dexter has arrived with pamphlets for kid-distracting activities! (Rita first notes that next-door-neighbor Elliott's girlfriend moved out -- that's two conspicuous mentions of that this week, you figure it's gonna crop up again soon.) For Cody, the Young Sailors' Club. For Astor, soccer (hilariously because "you can kick things"). Cody's psyched, but Astor is surly about soccer AND ballet. And when Dexter pulls out a pamphlet for Little Scientists, she snaps, "Why do you hate me so much??" Normally I'd chafe at Astor being such a brat, but honestly, I might react that way to Little Scientists too. So, back to the drawing board there.

Cut to Arthur and Dexter, early the next morning, driving out into the swamplands. DVO: "Two serial killers go out for a ride. Why do I get the feeling this joke ends with only one of them coming back?" That line weighed heavily in the previews for this episode, and while I was certainly not expecting their big, bloody confrontation to take place in Ep 7, what goes down on this little road trip is still a big ol' letdown. So let's get to it! Trinity takes Dexter to the back of the van and tells him to choose a weapon; there's a chainsaw, an axe, a band saw, some hedge clippers, et cetera. Dex picks the axe, while Trinity goes chainsaw. I WONDER IF THEY'LL START FIGHTING NOW PROBABLY NOT. Sigh. No, they're just gonna cut down a tree and let the portent lie thick in the air.

It should be noted that Arthur is in an extremely glum/irritable mood today, for no particular reason. It doesn't help that he can't get his chainsaw to start (ooh! That gives me an idea for a Cialis ad pitch. None of you steal my intellectual property!). Dexter can, however, and he managed to cut down the small-ish tree without much effort. After, he starts plugging Arthur for further advice on how to get the kids involved with stuff. Arthur basically says make it an order, not a request. Of course, subtle domineering of the sort Arthur probably pulled on his kids is best implemented from Day One. I can't imagine someone like Astor would respond to anything like that. But Trinity's in a mood, so let him have his opinion. Dexter continues to pester Arthur about why not just buy lumber from the hardware store, and Arthur snaps back that he doesn't like the lumber from the lumber yard! Also, he sprinkled some of his mother's ashes in his cheerios this morning and they told him to go cut down a tree. You know how breakfast goes.

As Arthur and Dexter drive on out of the woods, a deer runs out onto the road, and they hit it. And here's where I take a break to watch footage of cars hitting deer on YouTube. It's morbidly fascinating to see how people react. And by "how people react" I mean "grown men scream like Twilight fans." Arthur is freaked at the sight of the deer, which isn't quite dead yet. Dexter says the suffering animal needs to be put out of its misery, but Arthur's too squeamish. Harry shows up to taunt wussy Arthur for a moment. He whimpers around while Dexter lets him dangle on the line a bit, which is cruel but appropriate. Harry would strongly prefer if Dexter just took the axe and killed Trinity now, but Dexter still wants to hang on to his font of familial wisdom. Finally, after much (MUCH) more whimpering from Arthur and carping from Harry, Dexter brings the axe down on Bambi's neck. Done. Gotta love the look of disappointment on Dexter's face after that little episode.

still can't get a search warrant for Farrow's studio. This is all music to an eavesdropping Dexter's ears, since "multiple murders" plus "judicial roadblocks" (plus, let's face it, "unrepentant douche") all add up pretty strongly to "Dexter's victim of the week." DVO could not be more thrilled. Or superfluous (yes, yes, you don't need a warrant, WE KNOW). And once again, Angel and LaGuarta are awkward around each other. Deb notices and asks LaGuerta about it, privately. LaGuerta bristles at the idea that there's a rumor going around; she curtly tells Debra to stop spreading it and won't discuss it further. You guys, I love LaGuerta, and I want nothing but happiness for her and Angel, but this subplot has outlived its usefulness.

Dexter does a web search on Farrow (on Tinselweb! The #1 web source for...tinsel), and then it's off to his studio, where Farrow's assistant is locking up for the night. Once he's gone, Dexter breaks in and finds the proofs from Estrella's shoot. Quite a few provocative photos that may have been artistic sadism or may have been documentation of a murder. Dex then takes out his handy black light and starts searching for fluid stains. Who parties harder than Dexter Morgan, you know? He, of course, does find one head-sized blood stain, accompanied by a steady trickle, leading to the wall. And it's there that Dex finds a fingernail embedded in the exposed brick. He takes the nail back to the morgue and matches it to Estrella's hand. Doesn't look good for Farrow.

Back in Trinity's basement, Arthur mirthlessly planes down the tree from this morning into planks. This happens a lot in this second half of the episode, without much variation. I shall try to keep you apprised of his progress. For now, still sanding it down.

Debra meets with her slattern of choice in the Miami Metro courtyard. The woman, Valerie, is decked out in some purple hippie-patterned halter that suggest she may not have changed clothes since her days of banging Harry. And bang she did. Val (can I call her Val?) is under the impression that Miami Metro wants to start paying her to be an informant again, but Deb's like, "Uh, no, but you can tell me if you were having a romantic relationship with my dad." Val doesn't think romance had much to do with it, but she was "one of Harry's girls." Deb's grossed out at that thought, as you can imagine. Seems Harry "picked the C.I.s based on how good we were in the sack." Before Val can continue describing the ways she'd drive Harry wild, Deb cuts the meeting short and hustles the fuck away.

Deb flees to Dexter's office and starts unspooling (though by Deb's standards it's a minor unspooling) about how all this information about Harry is to

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Dexter

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