Episode Report Card
Mr. Stupidhead: A | Grade It Now!
Dex 'n' Doakes 'n' Doakes 'n' Dex, Partez-Two?

Oh, great. LMPMT is at the station. Dexter spots her, and immediately turns around before she spots him. "There's a complication I don't need." I guarantee she's gonna fuck some shit up before this season's done. Man oh man. Angel spots Lila, and walks up behind her, saying, "Hey, baby. What brings you back?" "I have two more walls at home, waiting for your expertise as a painter," she says absently, looking around for any sign of Dexter. Dude, what's she up to? What is she going to do to poor Angel? She gives me the willies. Angel explains that there's nothing he'd like to do more, but he's picking up his daughter in an hour: "We're meeting Dexter and Rita at the beach." Dammit, Angel. Don't tell her that! "You know, I have a friend at Miami Art Museum who teaches an incredible children's class," she says. "You can bring the whole gang, if you like!" "You mind if I take a rain check?" he says. "You know, with your history with Dexter, it might be a little awkward. He's trying to work things out with Rita." "Oh, is he, now?" she says with an empty smile, and quickly, she's on her way out, telling Angel to have a great day and to "watch out for those sand fleas." Nutbar! Just sayin'! Don't do it, Angel. Fucking settle that! "Damn, she'd better be worth it," he says to himself once she's gone. Angel, no! Bad Angel! She's totally not. Oh, boy.

Dexter's back at the cabin, again. I'm sorry, but isn't the drive from Miami to the Everglades, like, two hours? This is getting silly. Just kill him, Dexter! ...Actually, no, don't. I like Doakes's character, and I hope he doesn't die. But I wouldn't mind seeing him taken down a peg. Anyway, Dexter enters the cabin, and Doakes is on the floor, drinking one of his bottles of water. "What was that shit last night? Some kind of fuckin' scare tactic?" "You said something, before you passed out, about my father. What was it?" "I don't know, what was it? I was kind of drugged at the time." Heh, true. Dexter leans down and says, "Don't test me, Sergeant." I think it's interesting that Dexter's still calling him "Sergeant." Maybe he needs to maintain the structure of the workplace so that he can look at Doakes more as a superior than as a human. Or maybe he's just used to calling him that. Anyway, Dex continues, "I could have killed you. I didn't." "You didn't because you can't. I've had time to think about this, Morgan. I don't fit that code you were talkin' about, do I? At first, I thought The Butcher only went after criminals, because nobody gives a goddamn what happens to 'em, but, I think you've got a conscience." Dexter begins to lose his patience: "Of course I have a conscience! I left you a place to shit, didn't I?" Dexter begins to pace around the cabin, and Doakes observes that Dex is "actually angry. I've never seen you angry, Morgan. This is good." "What did you say about Harry?" asks Dex, completely ignoring Doakes. "I believe the words 'whack job' were involved." "Oh, yeah," says Doakes with a laugh. "Is that what you're worried about, man? I guess it would bother me, too, if it were my old man." "Sergeant?" "Okay, what the fuck. You know how I've been looking into your past, right?" Dexter mentions that that's why Doakes is in his current predicament. "Well, I found something I wasn't supposed to see. It's about your father's death." "Heart disease, big mystery," says Dex. "No, the mystery's bigger than that, and someone up high didn't want it solved." Dexter studies his face for a long moment, then says, "You're lying." "It was buried deep, but it was there." "What was there?" Doakes stands up in the cage and stretches out, then says, "Why don't we go outside and talk about this, man, I could use some fresh air." He and Dexter actually share a laugh at the total absurdity of the situation, but Dex sobers up rather quickly and tells Doakes that ain't happening. "Well, then, the mystery remains," says Doakes, knowing that this is one of the few bargaining chips he has left. "I'm sure special ops taught you to rattle your captor, but I should warn you, Sergeant, you can't play on my feelings. I don't have any." Bullshit! Doakes calls him out: "Oh, really? Who's lyin' now?" Yeah, Dexter, who's lyin' now?

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